Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 3: Episode 8
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Air Date:Host:Musical Guest:Special Guests:Cameos:Bit Players:
December 17th, 1977
Miskel Spillman
Elvis Costello
Al Franken
Tom Davis
Michael O’Donoghue
Buck Henry
Joe Franken
Phoebe Franken
Miskel Spillman’s Graddaughter
Tom Schiller
Mitchell Laurance
Cheryl Hardwick
Miskel’s Joint
Summary: Buck Henry and Laraine Newman are horrified to learn that John Belushi helped calm down the “Anyone Can Host” contest winner’s nerve by offering her a joint.
Transcript
Montage
Miskel Spillman’s Monologue
Summary: Mellowed out thanks to John Belushi, “Anyone Can Host” contest winner Miskel Spillman guards her treasured fruit bowl from Buck Henry.
Transcript
Meat Wagon Action Track Set
Summary: When racing cars wreck, the toy ambulance kit comes to the rescue.
American Date the Self-Concious Association
Summary: American Date the Self-Concious Association spokeswoman (Laraine Newman) recommends that members of her organization pair off with members of the Society for the Extremely Obnoxious.
Transcript
The Gift Of The Magi
Summary: Robert (John Belushi) sells his watch and donates a kidney for his ailing wife, Helen (Gilda Radner), but she only sells her hair brush in order to buy him a cheap watch chain for Christmas.
Transcript
Elvis Costello performs “Watching the Detectives”
Also Performed: 88o, 90t.
Weekend Update with Jane Curtin & Dan Aykroyd
Recurring Characters: Emily Litella.
Sartresky & Hutch
Summary: The philosophical Sartresky (Dan Aykroyd) and the rough-and-tumble Hutch (John Belushi) mediate a hostage situation involving an old friend (Bill Murray).
The Franken & Davis Show
Summary: Al Franken sings a musical tribute to his parents, Joe and Phoebe, until a painful childhood memory brings out the worst in him.
E. Buzz Miller’s Art Classics
Summary: E. Buzz Miller (Dan Aykroyd) and co-host Christie Christina (Laraine Newman) look for naughty symbolism in classic works of art.
Recurring Characters: E. Buzz Miller, Christie Christina.
Transcript
Elderly Girlfriend
Summary: Jeff (John Belushi) surprises his parents (Dan Aykroyd, Jane Curtin) by bringing home an elderly girlfriend (Miskel Spillman) for Christmas.
Transcript
Santa Says No
Summary: A drunken department store Santa (Bill Murray) delights in denying a little girl (Gilda Radner) gifts for Christmas.
Transcript
Mr. Mike’s Least-Loved Bedtime Tale: The Soiled Kimono
Summary: In a scene reminiscent of Edward G. Robinson and Clair Trevor in “Key Largo”, Mr. Mike (Michael O’Donoghue) forces Laraine Newman to sing an aria from “Madame Butterfly” if she wants to hear his least-loved bedtime tale of how the Soiled Kimono drink got its name.
Recurring Characters: Mr. Mike.
Transcript
Elvis Costello performs “Radio, Radio”
GoodnightsTranscript
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