Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 3: Episode 18
April 22nd, 1978
The Blues Brothers
Rock ConcertSummary: Don Kirshner (Paul Shaffer) introduces brothers Jake (John Belushi) and Elwood Blues (Dan Aykroyd), who perform “Hey, Bartender”.
Recurring Characters: Don Kirshner, Elwood Blues, Jake Blues.
Steve Martin’s MonologueSummary: Steve Martin performs a magic trick that involves pickpocketing an unsuspecting audience member (Bill Murray).
First Hosted: 76e.
Hey You!Summary: Woman (Gilda Radner) garners attention by using the perfume for one-night stands.
Note: Repeat from: 77g.
The Festrunk BrothersSummary: Georg (Steve Martin) and Yortuk Festrunk (Dan Aykroyd) are glum when Cliff (Garrett Morris) convinces them they’ve been “hosed” by a couple of chicks (Laraine Newman, Gilda Radner) who have kept them waiting so they can pick up borth control devices at the Statue of Liberty.
Recurring Characters: Georg Festrunk, Yortuk Festrunk, Cliff.
Theodoric of York, Medieval BarberSummary: Theodoric of York (Steve Martin) improvises medicinal tactics even though it remains an unperfected art in the medieval age.
Recurring Characters: Theodoric of York, Broom Gilda.
Dancing In The DarkSummary: Time stands still as strangers (Steve Martin, Gilda Radner) dance wildly through a swanky nightclub.
Weekend Update with Jane Curtin & Dan AykroydSummary: Dan Aykroyd pays Garrett Morris to pick up a supply of marijuana so he can perform a paraquat test. Dan Aykroyd and Jane Curtin perform a Point/Counterpoint on federal aid for abortions.
Steve Martin performs “King Tut”Transcript
Love StorySummary: Husband (John Belushi) and wife (Jane Curtin) fill each other with tales of extramarital affairs in order to help get themselves in the mood for one another in the bedroom.
Swan Lake BalletSummary: In a film by Gary Weis, ballerinas perform “Swan Lake” alongside hip hop dancers.
Troff ‘n’ BrewSummary: Business executives (Steve Martin, Bill Murray, Jane Curtin, Garrett Morris, Dan Aykroyd, John Belushi) feast like hogs at the trendy Troff ‘n’ Brew restaurant.
Nerds Science FairSummary: Lisa Loopner (Gilda Radner) and Todd DiLaMuca (Bill Murray) enter their Dialing For Toast exhibit in the school Science Fair, where they compete against Charles “The Spaz” Knerlman (Steve Martin) and his scret project.
Recurring Characters: Lisa Loopner, Todd DiLaMuca, Charles Knerlman.
The Blues Brothers perform “I Don’t Know”
Next Week In ReviewSummary: Maxine Universe (Laraine Newman) moderates as psychics (Steve Martin, Dan Aykroyd, Jane Curtin) predict world events of the very-near future.
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