SNL Transcripts: Michael Palin: 01/27/79: State Of The Union 1979

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 4: Episode 10

78j: Michael Palin / The Doobie Brothers

State Of The Union 1979

Ray McDougal V/O…..Al Franken
President Jimmy Carter…..Dan Aykroyd

[ open on exterior, Capitol Hill, with SUPER: “The State of the Union – 1979” ]

Announcer: From Washington, D.C., NBC presents President Carter’s State of the Union Address. Now, from inside the Capitol, is NBC’s Ray MacDougal.

[ dissolve to interior, politicians talking amongst themsleves as they wait for Carter’s arrival ]

Ray MacDougal V/O: In just a moment, the House Doorkeeper will announce the President. Rumor had it earlier today that the President may not have been able to give the address, because of a painful medical problem, but we’ve heard that he definitely is here. And, uh —

[ the house Speaker stands ]

House Speaker: Mr. Speaker! The President of the United States!

[ real footage of Carter entering the interior to huge applause, as everyone attempts to shake his hand as he makes his way to th front ]

Ray MacDougal V/O: The President is.. waddling into the House Chambers now. The entire Congress is, of course, aware of the President’s condition, and they are obviously applauding his courage – his stoic face refuses to betray the obvious discomfort caused by his affliction.

[ cut now to Dan Aykroyd as Carter, who finally makes his way to the front, walking stiffly so as to highlgiht his discomfort ]

President Jimmy Carter: My fellow Americans.. as I start my third year as President.. I’m happy to announce.. that the state of the union.. is the best it’s ever been. We are in great shape. We are at peace, more people are jogging, we have the best Superbowl ever!

[ stock footage of the room applauding ]

But, we do have problems. The most irritating of which is the constant swelling of inflation. The vessels of our economy.. are dangling in suspense.. to see how this nagging problem will be rectified. Inflation is not pretty. After a long, hard look.. I believe I’ve put my finger on the problem. We have overextended ourselves.. put too much strain on our economy for opportunists —

[ show Ted Kennedy in the crowd, with SUPER: “Next President” ]

Therefore, to drive the piles for a new foundation, to deal with inflation, I will present to Congress a comprehensive legislative package that I call: Preparation-I. With diligent application, this program will hopefully shrink inflation, and relieve this burden which itches away at the base of out economy.

[ stock footage of the room applauding ]

I could go on and describe, in the most vague generalities – inadequate efforts – that arms reductions are human rights. But I just can’t take standing here any longer. So, “Live, from New York, it’s Saturday Night!”

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