Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 4: Episode 17
78q: Milton Berle / Ornette Coleman
Rock Concert
Don Kirshner … Paul Shaffer
Karen Kirshner … Gilda Radner
Cop … Garrett Morris
Indian … John Belushi
Biker … Dan Aykroyd
Construction Worker … Bill Murray
[Pop music impresario Don Kirshner sits in a TVcontrol room, woodenly reading off cue cards,addressing the camera.]
Don Kirshner: I’m Don Kirshner and welcome toRock Concert. I first met the Village Persons twoyears ago when their lead singer, Lyle Manning,provided the floral arrangements for my daughterKaren’s bas mitzvah. Today, thanks to the brilliantdisco production of Giorgio Morali and to theirmanager Maury Mineo, they have become a vibrant forcein the music industry. Now, to introduce them from theperspective of a young person who can enjoy theirmusic without understanding its homosexualconnotations, here is my daughter, KarenKirshner.
[Applause for Karen Kirshner who enters and sits nextto Don — she, too, reads the cue cards woodenly,sounding exactly like her father.]
Karen Kirshner: I first saw the Village Personsperform at L.A.’s famed Roxy Theater where theydebuted their hit single “Health Club Man.” Tonight,thanks to my good friend Herb Karp at PolysutraRecords, they’re here to perform their new hit, “BendOver, Chuck Berry.” Ladies and gentlemen, pleasewelcome The Village Persons.
[Applause. Disco music begins. Dissolve to a mirroredchandelier and pan down to reveal a glittering discoset where the Village Persons gyrate to the beat: anative American Indian in full tribal regalia, aconstruction worker, a biker in leather with a thickmustache, a sailor, a cowboy and the wildly intense,energetic lead singer, a uniformed cop.]
The Village Persons:
Bend over … Bend over and over
Bend over and over and over
Bend over and over and over
Cop:
I went down to the disco to make it with my localdeejay
Well, he looks so good in leather and he knows whichrecords to play
Well, I walked right up to him but I didn’t know whatto say
Uh huh!
Well, he told me he was macho and he worked outdown at the gym
Ha ha! Yeah!
The Village Persons: Bend over, over andover
Cop: I said, hey, look, you’re the boss andthe turntable started to spin
The Village Persons: Bend over, over andover
Cop: And before too long I was reallygettin’ in to him
The Village Persons:
Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!
Bend over, Chuck Berry
Put your guitar away
‘Cause they’re playin’ disco music
From New York to L.A.
Cop: Not to mention Philadelphia, P-A.
The Village Persons:
Take a look around you
There’s no more rock and roll today
So bend over, Chuck Berry
Disco is here to stay
The Village Persons: [posing provocatively]
Bend over … Bend over and over
Bend over and over and over
Cop:
… Yeah!
So the next time you’re lonely and you’re crawlingon your hands and knees
The Village Persons: Bend over, over andover
Cop: And you’re checkin’ out each young manto find out where he wears his keys
The Village Persons: Bend over, over andover
Cop: Come on down to the disco where thedeejays aim to please
The Village Persons:
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Bend over, Chuck Berry
Put your guitar away
‘Cause they’re playin’ disco music
From New York to L.A.
Cop: The places goin’ down in ‘FriscoBay.
The Village Persons:
Take a look around you
There’s no more rock and roll today
Cop: Do you hear me, man? Bend over!
The Village Persons: So bend over, ChuckBerry
Cop: What would Little Richardsay?
The Village Persons: Hey!
[Song ends. Dancers stop. Applause.]
Submitted Anonymously
