Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 5: Episode 13
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Air Date:Host:Musical Guest:Special Guests:Cameos:Bit Players:
March 8th, 1980
Rodney Dangerfield
The J. Geils Band
None
Jerry Mathers
Tony Dow
Yvonne Hudson
Matt Neuman
Sarah Paley
Alan Zweibel
Andy Murphy
Rodney’s Dressing Room
Summary: Father Guido Sarducci (Don Novello) bunks up in Rodney Dangerfield’s dressing room and brings in visitors to help invade the small space.
Recurring Characters: Father Guido Sarducci.
Transcript
Montage
Rodney Dangerfield’s Monologue
Summary: Rodney Dangerfield jokes about his lack of respect in life.
Transcript
Niggerrand
Summary: Spokesman (Harry Shearer) promotes the authentic gold coin that celebrates the African miners who dug it up.
Transcript
Dr. Shockley’s House of Sperm
Summary: Dangerfield tries to keep up with townspeople who crave his sperm donation.
Transcript
The J. Geils Band performs “Love Stinks”
Weekend Update with Jane Curtin & Bill Murray
Summary: Bill Murray questions Tony Dow and Jerry Mathers about the latter’s Vietnam War death rumor. Father Guido Sarducci interviews a recipient of a nationality-change operation.
Recurring Characters: Father Guido Sarducci.
Transcript
Manhasset
Summary: Nightclub comedian Rodney Davis (Rodney Dangerfield) ponders whether or not a relationship with 10-year old Tracy (Laraine Newman) is right for him.
Road To Moscow
Summary: Curt Gowdy (Harry Shearer) asks athletes whether President Carter’s boycott of the Summer Games in Moscow will hurt the Russians or American athletes.
Next Week
Summary: Gilda Radner and Jane Curtin announces that next week is “SNL”‘s 100th episode.
Substitute Judge
Summary: A substitute judge (Brian Doyle-Murray) deals with an unruly courtroom trying to take advantage of him.
Transcript
The J. Geils Band performs “Sanctuary”
America on the Job
Summary: A salute to the men and women who inspect shirts manufactured in America.
Goodnights
Transcript
