SNL Transcripts: Malcolm McDowell: 11/22/80: The Execution

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 6: Episode 2

80b: Malcolm McDowell / Captain Beefheart and the Magic Band

The Execution

Prisoner…..Gilbert Gottfried
Priest…..Charles Rocket
Executioner…..Joe Piscopo
Mother…..Denny Dillon

[ open on dark corridor, as a prisoner is led to the electric chair. A priest reads from the Psalm of David as they walk. ]

Priest: [ reading ]“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness
for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil,
for thou art with me;
thy rod and thy staff,
they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me
in the presence of my enemies;
thou anointest my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord

Prisoner: I’m sorry, Father!

Priest: God will forgive you.

Prisoner: I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Father…

[ he is strapped down in the electric chair ]

Prisoner: I’m sorry… I’m sorry, Father… Sorry…

[ the executioner grabs the handle ]

Executioner: All set.

Mother V/O: That’s my son! My son, I HAVE to see him!

[ the prisoner’s mother runs forward ]

Prisoner: Mom!

Mother: Son! Sit up STRAIGHT!! Sit up STRAIGHT!!!

[ the executioner pulls the switch, as the electrical jolt causes the prisoner to stretch out straight in the chair ]


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