SNL Transcripts: Sally Kellerman: 02/07/81


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 6: Episode 9

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


Bit Players:

February 7th, 1981

Sally Kellerman

Jimmy Cliff


Marc Weiner

Jim Fowler

Andy Murphy

Terry Sweeney

Pam Norris
A Message from the President of the United StatesSummary: President Ronald Reagan (Charles Rocket) uses a series of charts to describe the state of the economy, then feigns surprise when guests arrive to celebrate his 70th birthday.

Recurring Characters: Ronald Reagan, Nancy Reagan.

Note: 1985-86 cast member Terry Sweeney, who was on the writing staff this season, makes an appearance as one of Reagan’s guests.


MontageNote: Eddie Murphy becomes a regular cast member in this episode.

Sally Kellerman’s MonologueSummary: Sally Kellerman name-drops her movies until the director asks her to stop.

The Rocket ReportSummary: Charles Rocket is on the scene at the welcome home parade for the American hostages who were in Iran.

The Gavonne FamilySummary: Talent scout Lorna Burns (Sally Kellerman) watches a stand-up comedian (Gilbert Gottfried) perform fro his Italian family.

Name That SinSummary: Game show contestants (Eddie Murphy, Ann Risley) identify taboos based on sound effects.

“Eye, Ear, Nose & Throat”Summary: A film featuring close-ups of body parts.

Was I Ever RedSummary: Snobby women recall their mealtime etiquette faux pas.

Iranian Joke BookSummary: Wacky jokes you can perform at home and use to fool your friends!

Jimmy Cliff performs “I Am The Living”

Weekend Update with Charles Rocket & Gail MatthiusSummary: Upon discovering that Abraham Lincoln didn’t sign the Emancipation Proclamation wasn’t signed, Eddie Murphy invites viewers to use a secret code to claim a Negro of their very own. Sports reporter Joe Piscopo interviews boxing hand puppet Rocko Weineretto (Marc Weiner).

Note: Charles Rocket wasn’t particularly enthused about having to share screen time with a hand puppet, to which Joe Piscopo later quipped that Rocket was jealous that the puppet got more laughs than he did.

Parent & ChildSummary: Mother (Ann Risley) and father (Joe Piscopo) explain their kinky foreplay habits to their son (Gilbert Gottfried).

“A Day In The Life Of A Hostage”Summary: Film documentary of a former hostage’s quest for public attention.

Lean AcresSummary: A counselor (Sally Kellerman) keeps fat farm members (Denny Dillon, Ann Risley) on a strict regimen, causing an audience member to interrupt the sketch in protest of how the overweight are being portrayed.


Jimmy Cliff performs “Gone Clear”

Iranian Student CouncilSummary: Members of the student council at Tehran University debate ideas for post-kidnapping activities and argue about their graduation prospects.

“New York”Summary: In a film by C.F. Bressler, New York City is represented through claymation.

Pillow PetsSummary: A husband (Gilbert Gottfried) is more attention to the needs of his pillow pets than to his own wife (Ann Risley).


Televised Criminal TrialSummary: The Supreme Court broadcasts a criminal trial in the same format as a talk show.


Sally Kellerman performs “Starting Over Again”


SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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