Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 6: Episode 12
Irene Cara…..Gail Matthius
[ open on male dancers on stage ]
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen — Miss Irene Cara!
[ Irene runs out and stands between the male dancers ]
Irene Cara: [ singing ]
“Baby, look at me
The girl who’s on TV
Sing the same song every time
Now you must know every rhyme by heart!
Grammys, Oscars, too
I do Captain Kangaroo
But you’re in good company
If you’re bored, think of me!
It’s always the sa-ame!
I sing the same some forever!
Next time, I may sing “Mame”!
Suffer the least rejection
And not have to wear these pants!
I keep getting yeast infections
This song has been always the same!
(Same! Same! Same! Same! Same! Same! Same! Same!)
At the Golden Globes
They ran short on stuff
Oh no, that was really nice
‘Cause they made me sing it twice in a row!
Diana Ross, for sure
Did not start out this way
All the kids at 21
Get to go out and have fun!
But me, it’s the same!
I sing this song forever
Just like some sci-fi film!
I play this lead on “Love Boat”
I play bits without malice!
I sing this song, the nation
Switches channels to “Dallas”
I wonder where all the fun went
Let me tell you, just goes redundant!
(Redundant! Redundant! Redundant! Redundant! Redundant! Redundant! Redundant!)
Remember my name!
I wish I was Marie Osmond
I think I’m going to flip!
I could now sing “Aida”
Get to wear clothes that unzip!
I could not live forever
Constantly bearing the shame!
Of being the only human
Who always sings exactly the same!
Exactly the same!
[ Irene and her back-up dancers stop, with their arms in the air ]
[ after a moment, the music kicks up again, and Irene and her back-up dancers hop off the stage and shimmy down the outer hall of Studio 8-H ]
[ fade ]