Where You’re Going

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Where You’re Going

Yuppie #1…..Randy Quaid


[ A group of yuppies sit around a table in a fancy restaurant, drinking ]

Yuppie #1: I gotta make a toast. Here’s to a guy who just sold his condo for five times what he paid for it!

[ rapid-fire scenes of yuppies living it up amongst the less-privileged, driving a Ferrari, pushing people aside in the streets, etc. ]

Jingle:
You want more than the rest
You just won’t take second best
You’ve never been number two
And you’re gonna get the things the world owes you.

Where you’re going, you’ve always known it
Where you’re going, you’re on your way.

[ Champagne glass reads “Where you’re going” ]

Where you’re going..
YOU’RE GONNA PAY!

[ Champagne glass now reads “HELL” – all the yuppies are howling andscreaming in Hell ]

Announcer: Yes, you’re going to Hell. For the life of false values, empty ambitions and raw greed, you’ve earned the agony of eternal torment. You’re going to burn, no doubt about it.

[ SUPER: “A message from Almighty God.” ]

Thanks to Tony DuMontfor this transcript.

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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