Ron Reagan’s Monologue

Ron Reagan’s Monologue

…..Ron Reagan


Don Pardo: Ladies and gentlemen, Ron Reagan!

[ audience cheers Ron as he enters Home Base ]

Ron Reagan, Jr.: Yeah, you haven’t lived ’til you’ve hyperventilated on live television! Od course, I just want to try something here. I want to see a show of hands: how many people here.. think that I was asked to host “Saturday Night Live”.. because I’m a new contributing editor with Playboy magazine?

[ audience cheers and applauds ]

Oh, really? That’s alright. Okay. Now.. how many people here.. think that I was asked to host the show.. because.. my father’s.. the President of the United States?

[ audience cheers and applauds louder ]

That’s what’s I thought. That’s what I thought, yeah!

You know, a lot of people – most people – believe that the President of the United States – whoever he or she might be – is the msot powerful person in the world. But how many people know.. who the second.. most powerful person in the world is? [ audience members begin to quietly chant responses, as Ron chuckles ] You might think it’s the Secretary of the State, maybe.. maybe the Chief of Staff, Speaker of the House.. maybe even the First Lady. [ shakes head ] Uh-uh. [ points thumb toward himself ] That’s right! That’s right. The President’s youngest son.. is the second most owerful person.. in the world!

It has its advantages, I have to say. For instance, uh.. oh.. you might have fantasized about taking an F-16 fighter plane out for a little low-level stunt-flying over a densely-populated area. No problem. No problem, when you’re the second most powerful person in the world.

Or, uh, maybe dream of giving away multi-million dollar water projects as Christmas presents. Just a matter of a few phone calls.. when you’re the second.. most powerful person.. in the world.

Okay, enough about me, right? We’ve got a great show. We’ve got The Nelsons, special guests Penn and Teller. [ audience applauds ] And, and for the first time in the history of the show, the show is being carried on the Armed Forces Television Network. [ audience cheers ] Now, it was a request – a special request – of the sub-Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces. It’s, uh.. it’s my sister Patty.

Anyway, we’ll be right back!

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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