Great Moments in the History of White Trash I


Great Moments in the History of White Trash I

Carl Starkwell…..Danny DeVito
Jolene Starkwell…..Nora Dunn
…..Willie Nelson

Announcer: In an ongoing celebration of America’s cultural diversity, NBC proudly presents “Great Moment in the History of White Trash”.

[ open on Carl & Jolene Starkwell drinking coffee at a table in a greasy spoon ]

Carl Starkwell: [ laughing ] To my newest bride. [ motions to pour liquor into Jolene’s cup of coffee ] Let me top that off for ya’.

Jolene Starkwell: Oh, honey.. it’s eight o’clock in the morning.

Carl Starkwell: Where does the time go! [ laughs ]

Jolene Starkwell: Well, alright. You’re gettin’ better lookin’ by the gulp.

Carl Starkwell: Well, you know.. you drink more than my sixth wife. Boy, is she a loser!

Jolene Starkwell: Well, I’ll make you forget all about her. What do ya say we drive up to Lookout Mountain and have ourselves a honeymoon?

Carl Starkwell: Uh.. I was gonna mention that, dearie. I think we’re gonna have to do that next week. The Trans Am’s up on blocks.

Jolene Starkwell: Alright. Pour me another.

Carl Starkwell: You got it, Sweet Cheeks!

[ SUPER: “Carl & Jolene Starkwell, First Cousins” ] [ zoom into box in upper right-hand corner, as Willie Nelson appears in the remainder of the screen ]

Willie Nelson: Carl never did get the Trans Am fixed. It just sat there in the front yard with it’s hood off ’til they got a divorce. Still, they sure were good people. This has been another Great Moment in the History of White Trash.

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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