Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 13: Episode 6
December 5th, 1987
Reagan-GorbachevSummary: President Ronald Reagan (Phil Hartman) shows movie-related landmarks to Mikhail Gorbachev (Danny DeVito).
Recurring Characters: President Ronald Reagan, Mikhail Gorbachev.
Danny DeVito’s MonologueFirst Hosted: 81s.
Summary: Danny DeVito shows off his high school yearbook to prove that he and Bruce Springsteen went to school together.
Handi-OffSummary: Office employee Sheila (Victoria Jackson) seeks a product that will resolve the problem she faces by having extra digits.
At The MoviesSummary: Gene Siskel (Kevin Nealon) and Roger Ebert (Phil Hartman) review Christmas porno films.
Recurring Characters: Roger Ebert.
Church ChatSummary: The Church Lady (Dana Carvey) talks to Danny DeVito about his so-called new “family friendly” movie, “Throw Momma From the Train”, then invites him to sing “Here Comes Santa Claus” while she performs a drum solo.
Recurring Characters: Church Lady.
Bryan Ferry performs “The Right Stuff”Bio: Bryan Ferry (1945-). Singer-songwriter; lead vocalist for Roxy Music; briefly dated Jerry Hall in the 1970’s.
Weekend Update with Dennis Miller
The Jungle RoomSummary: Nancy Maloney (Victoria Jackson) will finally sing at Eddie Spimozo’s (Jon Lovitz) Jungle Room.
Recurring Characters: Eddie Spimozo, Charlie Loomis, Nancy Maloney.
White Trash Appraiser
Ann Landers’ PlayhouseRecurring Characters: Ann Landers.
Bryan Ferry performs “Kiss & Tell”
The DoormanSummary: A tenant (Phil Hartman) and his doorman (Danny DeVito) fail to accurately recall events since knowing one another.