SNL Transcripts: Demi Moore: 11/12/88: Businessman’s Chatter Line


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 14: Episode 5

88e: Demi Moore / Johnny Clegg & Savuka

Businessman’s Chatter Line

Businessman #1 ….. Phil Hartman
Businessman #2 ….. Kevin Nealon
Businessman #3 ….. Jon Lovitz
Businessman #4 ….. Dana Carvey

[ Businessman #1 sits by a window, looking sad. ]

Male V/O: Sometimes, it’s lonely being a businessman. That’s why you need …

[ Cut to the title still. Bouncy techno music plays. ]

Female V/O: Businessman’s Chatter Line!

[ Cut to Businessman #1 on the phone with Businessman #2 ]

Businessman #1: So what color of suit do you like? Blue or gray?

Businessman #2: Well, I think I lean toward gray.

Businessman #1: I like gray, but blue is good too.

Businessman #2: Yes, it is.

Female V/O: Businessman’s Chatter Line can handle up to 14 businessmen at one time.

[ Two other businessmen join the conversation ]

Businessman #3: So, do you live in the city or do you commute?

Businessman #4: Oh, I commute!

Businessman #3: Me too!

Businessman #1: I used to live in the city, but now I commute.

Female V/O: With Businessman’s Chatter Line, you can make crazy new friends!

Businessman #1: So what sports do you guys play?

Businessman #2: Golf.

Businessman #3: Golf.

Businessman #4: I don’t play anything, but I was thinking of taking up golf.

Businessman #1: Yeah, that’s what I play! Golf!

Female V/O: Businessman’s Chatter Line! Dial 1-900-BIZ-TALK. Only five tax-deductible dollars per minute, plus tolls if any.

Male V/O: No non-businessmen, please. Crank calls will be prosecuted.

[ fade to black ]

Submitted by: G. Gomez

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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