Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 14: Episode 14
Glenn Close’s Monologue
Glenn Close: Thank you, thank you! Wow! Oh, boy.. Well, this is really exciting for me! I’m really excited, I’m really happy to be here, working with these incredible people! But.. this part – the monologue – is something I’ve really been dreading.. um.. I’ve been dreading all week, you see, because, I always think of my Mom, and my `Mom always said, “Just don’t talk about yourself, it’s rude to talk about yourself, especially in public.” So, you know, I’ve never felt comfortable doing it – I don’t feel comfortable now. In fact, I think I’ve already told you too much about myself! [ laughs ] But since, you know, at this point in the show, I know that you expect to kind of get to know me a little bit more.. I’ve asked one of my closest friends, who knows me really well, to come out and talk about me for me. So, ladies and gentlemen, I’m thrilled to introduce one of the finest actors in film and theater today, my dear friend, William Hurt.[ audience goes wild upon Hurt’s entrance ]
William Hurt: Thank you. Um.. there isn’t much time, and a lot to cover, so let’s get started. I’ve known Glenn for more a decade. She is one of my closest friends, and probably the person I most admire. Complicated, yes; demanding, true; difficult, at times; temperamental, oh yes! Hard to take over a long period of time? Not to me. Wether she’s right for the part or not, Glenn always gets the job done. She proves the truth of the saying: “Acting is 10% talent, and 90% plain old hard work.” And no one outworks Glenn Close. The first to arrive in the morning, the last to go home at night – always reliable, always punctual, always prepared.
Now, this is something that Glenn would never tell you herself, but, in her fifteen years as an actress, she has never missed a single day of work due to illness. In the theater and motion pictures, Glenn has successfully tackled a wide range of serious, dramatic, non-comedic roles. And made each in her Yeoman-like manner, uniquely her own. Obviously, I’m a friend of Glenn’s, so I’m prejudiced – but I would place her in the top 4 or 5 actresses working in film and stage in American. In her age group. In non-comedic dramatic roles. And, of those 4 or 5, easily the hardest working. Glenn Close is not just America’s hardest-working actres, she’s also my friend.
Glenn Close: Thanks, Bill. Bill, can I introduce you when you host this show?
William Hurt: Oh, Glenny, I would never host this show!
Glenn Close: Well, stick around. We have the Gipsy Kings, and I’ll be right back!