SNL Transcripts: Ed O’Neill: 01/13/90: BiziLady

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 15: Episode 10

89j: Ed O’Neill / Harry Connick, Jr.


…..Jan Hooks
…..Nora Jones
…..Victoria Jackson

[ open on Victoria Jackson running through the streets of New York to catch a cab. Once inside, she casually removes product from purse and nicks off a few unwanted hairs around her knees. ]

“She’s on the go
Movin’ fast
She’s gonna make that smooth look last.
She’s BiziLadyyyyyyyy!BiziLady!”

[ cut to Nora Dunn at a business meeting. As she makes her presentation, she casually reaches underneath the table to nick a few unwanted hairs from her leg with product. The men do their best to get a look under the table. ]

“She’s movin’ up now
And men don’t care.
‘Cause they can’t see unwanted hair.
Under the ladyyyyyy!

[ cut to Jan Hooks on a date at the opera. Paying no mind to the other people in the theatre, she stretches her arm up and uses product to remove a few unwanted hairs from her armpit. Her date expresses his pleasure. ]

“She’s soft to touch
Not like a man.
Just want to stay as smooth as she can.
With BiziLadyyyyyyyy!

[ cut to Victoria Jackson picking up her young daughter at school. The young girl is using a simulated product to remove unwanted hairs from a baby doll’s leg. As Victoria leans down, her daughter uses the product to remove a few unwanted hairs from Victoria’s upper lip. ]

“She’s soft and sleek
Smooth and soft
Sleek and soft
Soft and soft.

[ show product in front of a perfectly-shaved wonman’s leg ]

Announcer: Now there isn’t anywhere you can’t be smooth.

BiziLady. The anywhere shaver from Go Girl Products.

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