Debra Winger’s Monologue
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen – Debra Winger!
Debra Winger: Thank you very much! If you had told me a week and a half ago that I’d be standing on this stage tonight, hosting “Saturday Night Live”, I would have said, “Why would I?” But.. as I look back on the amazing coincendences that brought me here, I can see that it was really quite inevitable.
As you all know, Monday night is Oscar night, so of course they wanted someone to host the show who had won an Oscar. Failing that, they wanted someone who had been nominated this year. Failing that, they wanted someone who had been nominated in the last ten years, and would be available.. meaning, someone who had not been invited to participate in the Oscar ceremony itself, either as a presenter or an invited guest. Evidently, only one person fit all these qualifications.. me.. so..
Plus, I was in New York anyway, having no reason to be in L.A. at this time of year. And I was available, having no projects lined up at any time soon. And here’s where the coincedences come in: I’m sitting in a restaurant last Fridy night, and who’s at the table next to me but a group of people from “Saturday Night Live”, talking about how they haven’t got a host for their Oscar show yet. So, if you put it all together – nominated for an Oscar in the last ten years, not invited to the ceremony, in New York, available, no projects, in the right restaurant at the right time.. well.. you can understand why I feel so special tonight. So don’t tell Debra Winger she wasn’t meant to host “Saturday Night Live” tonight.
Anyway.. Eric Clapton is here. See, he was in town, on tour, and he’s got an album coming out. So we’ve got a great show, we’ll be right back, this is the end of the monologue.