SNL Transcripts: Sting: 01/19/91: The Richmeister



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 16: Episode 11


90k: Sting

The Richmeister

Tom…..Mike Myers
Richmeister…..Rob Schneider
Randy…..Kevin Nealon
Steve…..Phil Hartman
Sandy…..Julia Sweeney
…..Sting

[Tom enters the copy room]

Richmeister: Tom! Tommy!

Tom: Hey Richard, I’m just making some copies.

Richmeister: The Tomster! Tom-Man! Tom-Tom!

Tom: How you doing, Richard?

Richmeister: The Tomster, makin’ copies! Mr. Tom! Tommy!

Tom: Yeah, see ya. [exits]

Richmeister: Tom! [Randy enters the copy room] Bill! Billy! The Billster! Bill-Man! Billy Bill Bill!

Randy: [annoyed] The name is Randy!

Richmeister: Randy! The Randster! Only one copy for the Randman! [Randy leaves] Randy! [Steve and Sandy enter] Steve and Sandy, makin’ copies! The Steve-Man and the Sandster, makin’ copies!

Steve: [to Sandy] Who is this guy, do you know him?

Sandy: Don’t worry about him, he’s just Richard Laymer. It’s just his way of trying to be nice. [to Richard] Hi, Richard!

Richmeister: The Sandster, saying hi! Sandy and Steve!

Steve: It’s kind of annoying; maybe somebody ought to talk to him.

Richmeister: Steve-o-rama! Steve-o-ramavitch!

Sandy: We’ve all tried, there’s nothing we can do.

Richmeister: All right! Steve-O’s finished with the copies! Sandy’s turn! Sandita! [Steve approaches Richmeister]

Steve: Hey guy, what’re you working on here?

Richmeister: Steve-o-rino!

Steve: Uh, you work for the accounting department, I guess, huh?

Richmeister: Steve-O!

Steve: So how do you like it here?

Richmeister: All right! Steve-o-rolo! The Stevemeister, askin’ me questions!

Steve: Well, I gotta finish my report, I’ll see you later. Richard! The Richmeister!

Richmeister: Yeah, makin’ friends with the Steveinator!

Sandy: [to Steve] I think there’s another copy machine on this floor.

Steve: Okay. [he and Sandy exit]

Richmeister: Steve-O, leavin’ the room! Walkin’ away with the Sandstress!

[Sting enters the copy room]

Sting: Hey Richard.

Richmeister: Sting! Dr. Stinglehoffer! Makin’ copies! The McStingster! Stingatolla! Sting! Stinga linga ding dong…dong. Sting!

[fade to black]

Submitted by: Johnny Lurg

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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