Victoria’s Secrets

Victoria’s Secrets

…..Victoria Jackson

Announcer: And now, it’s time for “Victoria’s Secrets”.

Victoria Jackson: Good evening. This week, I have three secrets that I’d like to reveal to you.. but please don’t tell anyone.

The first secret is: A lot of people ask me, “Are you as dumb as you appear on the show?” The answer is, “I don’t know.” I never watch the show.

My second secret is: A lot of men ask me, “How do you like it?” And I say, “Like what?” And they say, “You know. Your sex.” And I say, “My sex, like being a woman? Or like, having sex?” And they say, “The second one.” And I say, “I forgot. Which one was the second one?” And they say, “Victoria, don’t do that stupid character.” And I say, “I’m not doing a character.” And they get mad and walk away.

My third secret is: I’m not wearing anything under my bra.. I don’t think. Just skin. And under the skin, just two saline implants. But, sshh! Don’t tell anyone. It’ll be our little secret. [ blows kiss and winks ]

Announcer: This has been “Victoria’s Secrets”.

SNL Transcripts

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