Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey


Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey


Jack Handey V/O:
He was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land.
He loved it so much he made a woman out of dirt and married her.
But when he kissed her, she disintegrated.
Later, at the funeral, when the preacher said, “Dust to dust,”
some people laughed, and the cowboy shot them.
At his hanging, he told the others,
“I’ll be waiting for you in heaven – with a gun.”

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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