Thanksgiving Party


Thanksgiving Party

Friend…..Dana Carvey
Martin…..Phil Hartman
Female Co-Worker #1…..Melanie Hutsell
Male Co-Worker #1…..Rob Schneider
Male Co-Worker #2…..David Spade
Female Co-Worker #2…..Ellen Cleghorne
Retarded Co-Worker…..Adam Sandler
Male Co-Worker #3…..Tim Meadows
Female Co-Worker #3…..Julia Sweeney
Male Co-Worker #4…..Kevin Nealon

Tim: So, this is where you work, huh, Larry?

Larry: Yeah, we have this Thanksgiving party every year.

Tim: Well, thanks for inviting me. It looks like fun.

Martin: [ approaching ] Hey, Larry!

Larry: Hey, Martin! This is my buddy, Tim.

Martin: How you doing, Tim? [ turns to Larry ] Hey. Cherry on top,Larry?

Larry: Hey, I always love a cherry on top!

Martin: Cherry every time! [ laughing, exits ]

Tim: [ confused, curious ] What was that about?

Larry: Oh. He brought his kids to the office yesterday, and I boughtsome ice cream sundaes for them, and they wouldn’t eat ’em because I didn’tput cherries on top.

Tim: [ assured, relaxed ] Oh! That’s funny!

Female Co-Worker #1: [ enters ] Larry! Was that you who shot theold woman, and blew up the school bus?

Larry: Yeah. Was that a problem?

Female Co-Worker #1: No! Good job! [ laughs ] Nice going, man![ exits ]

Larry: Thanks. [ Tim looks over curiously ] Oh! Oh, I had toenlarge some photos, man, for a brochure we’re doing on school safety, man.[ laughs ]

Tim: Oh, of course. [ laughs ]

Rob: [ enters ] Hey, Larry. That stinker of yours really cleared the roomthis morning.

Larry: [ laughs ] I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was going to happen.

Rob: Just try to warn us next time. [ exits ]

Tim: [ confused again ] What was that?

Larry: Oh, my District Manager, Fred Stinker, paid a surprise visitthis morning. Everybody just ducked out of the office.

Tim: Ohh.. okay.

David: [ enters ] Hey, Larry. Hey, I hope your butt’s okay from the othernight. You know.. uh.. you should have told me you were a beginner.

Larry: Hey, I asked for it. It hurt, but it felt good to finally goout and do it.

David: Well, if you ever want to do it again, let me know. And your friend’sinvited, too. [ exits ]

Tim: [ Starting to interpret for himself ] Horseback riding?

Larry: Yeah, horseback riding!

Female Co-Worker #2: Hey-ey, Larry.. Listen: “If you wanna be insideof me, you can be inside of me anytime you want. [ laughs ] Ready when youare!”

Larry: Sounds good to me. [ laughs as she exits, then turns backto Tim ] Oh! Lisa and I are working on this new slogan for a 24-hourshopping mall. [ laughs ]

Retarded Co-Worker: [ enters, making unusual hand and facialgestures ] Hebby-hebby-hooooo! Hebby-hebby-hoooo! [ exits ]

Tim: What’s that about?

Larry: Oh, he’s retarded. He works in the office once a week. He’sa nice guy.

Male Co-Worker #3: [ enters, makes the same hand and facial gesturesas Adam ] Hebby-hebby-hoooo! Hebby-hebby-hoooo! [ exits ]

Tim: [ concerned ] Is he also, uh..?

Larry: Oh, no, no, no. He’s just making fun of the retarded guy.

Female Co-Worker #2: How’s it going, Larry?

Larry: Fine. [ she walks away ] Uh.. we had this wild affair lastsummer.

Tim: I figured..

Male Co-Worker #4: [ enters, ecstatic ] He-ey, how you doing, Larry?

Larry: Hey, how you doing?

Male Co-Worker #4: [ laughing ] Pretty crazy the other night, huh?

Larry: Aw, crazy, you know it!

Male Co-Worker #4: I do, man! You’re the wild man!

Larry: [ laughing ] Yeah!

Male Co-Worker #4: When she did that – you were running!

Larry: Oh, I was, man!

Male Co-Worker #4: [ jumping hysterically ] Whoo-hoo, whoo-hoo!

Larry: [ jumping hysterically with him ] Whoo-hoo, whoo-hoo!

Male Co-Worker #4: Hey, next week, I’ll be wearing my thumbcap!

Larry: Oh, don’t say it!

Male Co-Worker #4: [ laughs and exits ]

Tim: [ more confused than ever ] What was that all about?

Larry: I have no idea. I don’t even know that guy. Come on, let meshow you the rest of my office..

[ Larry and Tim leave the party ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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