Thanksgiving Party

Thanksgiving Party

Friend…..Dana Carvey
Martin…..Phil Hartman
Female Co-Worker #1…..Melanie Hutsell
Male Co-Worker #1…..Rob Schneider
Male Co-Worker #2…..David Spade
Female Co-Worker #2…..Ellen Cleghorne
Retarded Co-Worker…..Adam Sandler
Male Co-Worker #3…..Tim Meadows
Female Co-Worker #3…..Julia Sweeney
Male Co-Worker #4…..Kevin Nealon

Tim: So, this is where you work, huh, Larry?

Larry: Yeah, we have this Thanksgiving party every year.

Tim: Well, thanks for inviting me. It looks like fun.

Martin: [ approaching ] Hey, Larry!

Larry: Hey, Martin! This is my buddy, Tim.

Martin: How you doing, Tim? [ turns to Larry ] Hey. Cherry on top,Larry?

Larry: Hey, I always love a cherry on top!

Martin: Cherry every time! [ laughing, exits ]

Tim: [ confused, curious ] What was that about?

Larry: Oh. He brought his kids to the office yesterday, and I boughtsome ice cream sundaes for them, and they wouldn’t eat ’em because I didn’tput cherries on top.

Tim: [ assured, relaxed ] Oh! That’s funny!

Female Co-Worker #1: [ enters ] Larry! Was that you who shot theold woman, and blew up the school bus?

Larry: Yeah. Was that a problem?

Female Co-Worker #1: No! Good job! [ laughs ] Nice going, man![ exits ]

Larry: Thanks. [ Tim looks over curiously ] Oh! Oh, I had toenlarge some photos, man, for a brochure we’re doing on school safety, man.[ laughs ]

Tim: Oh, of course. [ laughs ]

Rob: [ enters ] Hey, Larry. That stinker of yours really cleared the roomthis morning.

Larry: [ laughs ] I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was going to happen.

Rob: Just try to warn us next time. [ exits ]

Tim: [ confused again ] What was that?

Larry: Oh, my District Manager, Fred Stinker, paid a surprise visitthis morning. Everybody just ducked out of the office.

Tim: Ohh.. okay.

David: [ enters ] Hey, Larry. Hey, I hope your butt’s okay from the othernight. You know.. uh.. you should have told me you were a beginner.

Larry: Hey, I asked for it. It hurt, but it felt good to finally goout and do it.

David: Well, if you ever want to do it again, let me know. And your friend’sinvited, too. [ exits ]

Tim: [ Starting to interpret for himself ] Horseback riding?

Larry: Yeah, horseback riding!

Female Co-Worker #2: Hey-ey, Larry.. Listen: “If you wanna be insideof me, you can be inside of me anytime you want. [ laughs ] Ready when youare!”

Larry: Sounds good to me. [ laughs as she exits, then turns backto Tim ] Oh! Lisa and I are working on this new slogan for a 24-hourshopping mall. [ laughs ]

Retarded Co-Worker: [ enters, making unusual hand and facialgestures ] Hebby-hebby-hooooo! Hebby-hebby-hoooo! [ exits ]

Tim: What’s that about?

Larry: Oh, he’s retarded. He works in the office once a week. He’sa nice guy.

Male Co-Worker #3: [ enters, makes the same hand and facial gesturesas Adam ] Hebby-hebby-hoooo! Hebby-hebby-hoooo! [ exits ]

Tim: [ concerned ] Is he also, uh..?

Larry: Oh, no, no, no. He’s just making fun of the retarded guy.

Female Co-Worker #2: How’s it going, Larry?

Larry: Fine. [ she walks away ] Uh.. we had this wild affair lastsummer.

Tim: I figured..

Male Co-Worker #4: [ enters, ecstatic ] He-ey, how you doing, Larry?

Larry: Hey, how you doing?

Male Co-Worker #4: [ laughing ] Pretty crazy the other night, huh?

Larry: Aw, crazy, you know it!

Male Co-Worker #4: I do, man! You’re the wild man!

Larry: [ laughing ] Yeah!

Male Co-Worker #4: When she did that – you were running!

Larry: Oh, I was, man!

Male Co-Worker #4: [ jumping hysterically ] Whoo-hoo, whoo-hoo!

Larry: [ jumping hysterically with him ] Whoo-hoo, whoo-hoo!

Male Co-Worker #4: Hey, next week, I’ll be wearing my thumbcap!

Larry: Oh, don’t say it!

Male Co-Worker #4: [ laughs and exits ]

Tim: [ more confused than ever ] What was that all about?

Larry: I have no idea. I don’t even know that guy. Come on, let meshow you the rest of my office..

[ Larry and Tim leave the party ]

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