SNL Transcripts: Sinbad: 11/21/92: The Proud Pattersons



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 18: Episode 7


92g: Sinbad / Sade

The Proud Pattersons

Mr. Patterson…..Sinbad
Renee Patterson…..Ellen Cleghorne
Young Patterson…..Chris Rock
Adrian Patterson…..Tim Meadows

FADE IN:

TITLE CARD DISPLAYS “THE OVERACTING NEGRO ENSEMBLE”

Announcer: The Overacting Negro Ensemble proudly presents…

DISSOLVE TO A FAMILY PORTRAIT OF THE PATTERSONS, A MIDDLE-AFRICAN AMERICAN FAMILY, POSING DIGNIFIED IN THE PHOTOGRAPH.

SUPER: The Proud Pattersons

Vocalist: [singing]“Ain’t got much,
but we got our pri- – de.
Mmm-mmm.”

SUPER: Starring Ossie Davis Jr. & Rubilette Dee.

INT. PATTERSON LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

MR. PATTERSON, late 50’s, slight gray hair, plaid shirt, chit-chats with his SON on the couch while they watch television and enjoy dinner.

Mr. Patterson: Renee! Bring over some salt!!

RENEE PATTERSON, in floral dress, gray hair, cardigan, sweeps in and raises her arms in the air.

Renee Patterson: MY CHICKEN-FRIED STEAK DON’T NEED NO SALT!!

Mr. Patterson: Listen, woman!! My taste buds want salt!! And this is one man who ain’t going to deny his taste buds!!

Renee Patterson: Then you get up! And you get that salt yourself!

Renee trembles in tears and clutches her hands to her chest.

Mr. Patterson: I! Ain’t! Getting! Up! What you watching, son!?

Young Patterson: I’m just flippin’ around, daddy!

Mr. Patterson: MY! Boy! Doesn’t flip around! You going to turn that TV! To! “Rescue 9-1-1!!” And we going to keep it on “Rescue 9-1-1!!”

Renee moves closer to the man, shaking her hands over and over again.

Renee Patterson: We ain’t going to watch no “Rescue 9-1-1!!” Not under this roof!! Not this family!!

Renee points to her son and clenches her fists.

Renee Patterson: You going to turn that channel and we going to watch the movie-of-the-week!! About the serial killer woman in Florida!!!

Renee tilts her head to the roof, eyes blood-shot red and watered.

Renee Patterson: And you going to like it!!

Mr. Patterson rises from the couch.

Mr. Patterson: I! Am! A! Man! I work 14 hours a day! I paid for that TV! With my sweat! And when I come home, I want to see Captain Kirk on that screen!

Young Patterson rises from the couch.

Young Patterson: What’s happening to us?!?! This ain’t a family no more!! Why can’t we just agree!?!?

Young Patterson reaches onto Renee’s arms and they both cry in exaltation.

Mr. Patterson: MY! Son! Does not cry!

Renee slaps Mr. Patterson.

Renee Patterson: I ain’t raising no more sons! That! Can’t! Speak their mind!

ADRIAN PATTERSON, early 30’s, in trench coat and suit, ENTERS.

Adrian Patterson: Hey, folks!

Renee Patterson: ADRIAN! Oh, my baby! You came home!! Where you been!?!?

Adrian Patterson: In Cleveland. Remember? I have a job there. It’s Thanksgiving. I’m visiting.

Mr. Patterson: Why you always running away, boy!!!

Renee Patterson: My boys! Don’t have to run out of town! You stand and be strong and tall!!

Adrian Patterson: What do you mean? I’m an engineer. It’s a great job.

Mr. Patterson: Don’t! You! Talk! To your mother like that! You! Raise! Your voice when you speak to you mother!

Adrian Patterson: Man, just relax a little bit. You guys expend so much energy that maybe if you calmed down, you’d get somewhere.

Overacting Pattersons: Oh! Oh!

All of them corner Adrian to the wall, pointing at him.

DISSOLVE TO THE FAMILY PORTRAIT OF THE PATTERSONS

SUPER: The Proud Pattersons

Vocalist: [singing]“Yes, we got our pr-id-id-e!”

END

Submitted by: Cody Downs

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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