Clinton Inaugural Gala
Barbra Streisand…..Mike Myers
Whoopi Goldberg…..Ellen Cleghorne
President Bill Clinton…..Phil Hartman
Hillary Clinton…..Jan Hooks
Chelsea Clinton…..Julia Sweeney
[ open on the Clinton Inaugural Gala, Barbra Streisand finishing the song “People”. ]
Whoopi Goldberg: Barbra Streisand, ladies and gentlemen! Yeah! give it up! This is so nice – this is all for you, Mr. President! Inauguration! Now it’s a new beginning, because it’s like, Bush – he didn’t know, because we was saying, “The people are hungry!” and he was saying, “Barbera, where’s the dog?” You dig, you know? Alright! now, we got a psecial surprise for you – all the way from.. well, I don’t know where she come from, but you know the sister is bad! And she’s here tonight, for you! Ladies and gentlemen, Madonna!
Madonna: Mr. President.. this is for you. [ whispers in song ] “Happy.. Inauguration.. to you.”
[ Clinton claps wildly ] “Happy.. Inauguration.. to you.”
[ Hillary fumes ]“Happy Inauguration, Mr.. Pwesident.”
[ Clinton has a huge smile on his face; Hillary is angry, Chelsea is confused ] “Happy.. Inauguration.. to you.”
[ Clinton and Hillary are now fighting over the personal tribute ]
“How.. old.. are.. you now?”
[ Clinton smiles, as Hillary fumes some more ]
“How.. old.. are.. you now?”
[ Hillary gets up to leave, as Clinton persuades her to stay ]
“How.. old.. are.. you, Mr.. Pwesident?”
[ Clinton holds Hillary in his arms, while giving the “Call Me!” signal to Madonna ]
“How.. old.. are.. you now?”
[ audience gives a standing ovation ]
[ Clinton gives Madonna the “Call Me!” signal again, but she shakes hr fingers “No, no”, and acknowledges Chelsea instead, who is pleasantly surprised by the outcome ]
Madonna: “Live, from New York, it’s Saturday Night!“
