SNL Transcripts: Charlton Heston: 12/04/93: Infiniti Q45 Toilet II



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 19: Episode 8








93h: Charlton Heston / Paul Westerberg

Infiniti Q45 Toilet II

Jonathan Pryce…..Mike Myers

Jonathan Pryce: This is the new Infiniti Q45 Toilet.

[ dons a pair of plastic safety glasses ]

Now pretend this [ pulls out rubber dart gun ] is poopy

[ Shoots dart at black, sleek looking toilet, which sticks momentarily and falls to the ground ]

Peepee [ shoots dart ] doody [ shoots dart ] caca [ shoots dart ] [ mutiple darts shot, all ultimately falling off ]

Infiniti developed a revolutionary non-stick finish which resists these hazards. [ shoots dart ]

I can’t explain the process [ removes glasses ], but they’ll be happy to at your Infiniti toilet showroom.

[ looks into camera with left eyebrow comically arched ]

Oh…tell them you already know the part about the caca.

[ SUPER: “Infiniti. Everything that’s possible in a toilet.” ] [ fade ]

Submitted by: David Thompson

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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