SNL Transcripts: Charlton Heston: 12/04/93: Infiniti Q45 Toilet II


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 19: Episode 8

93h: Charlton Heston / Paul Westerberg

Infiniti Q45 Toilet II

Jonathan Pryce…..Mike Myers

Jonathan Pryce: This is the new Infiniti Q45 Toilet.

[ dons a pair of plastic safety glasses ]

Now pretend this [ pulls out rubber dart gun ] is poopy

[ Shoots dart at black, sleek looking toilet, which sticks momentarily and falls to the ground ]

Peepee [ shoots dart ] doody [ shoots dart ] caca [ shoots dart ] [ mutiple darts shot, all ultimately falling off ]

Infiniti developed a revolutionary non-stick finish which resists these hazards. [ shoots dart ]

I can’t explain the process [ removes glasses ], but they’ll be happy to at your Infiniti toilet showroom.

[ looks into camera with left eyebrow comically arched ]

Oh…tell them you already know the part about the caca.

[ SUPER: “Infiniti. Everything that’s possible in a toilet.” ] [ fade ]

Submitted by: David Thompson

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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Leah Peters
Leah Peters
4 years ago

Why isn’t the actual video available anywhere???

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