Lunch Lady Land

Lunch Lady Land

…..Sara Gilbert

Adam Sandler: This is a song about the high school experience sung through the eyes of the person who – more than anyone else – puts young people on the right path. I’m not talking about the teachers, I’m not talking about the coaches, I’m not even talking about the guidence counselors. I’m talking about a person we call.. The Lunch Lady.

[ singing ]

Woke up in the morning, put on my new plastic glove.
Served some reheated salsbury steak with a little slice of love.

I got no clue what the chicken pot pie is made of..
Just know everything’s doing fine down here in…

Well I wear this net on my head..cuz my red hair is fallin’ out.
I wear these brown orthapedic shoes cuz I got a bad case of the gout.

I know you want seconds on the corn dogs,
but there’s no reason to shout.

Everybody gets enough food down here in the magical..

(G. E. Smith & band joins in)

Well yesterday’s meatloaf is today’s sloppy joes.
And my breath reaks of tuna
and there’s lots of black hairs comin’ out of my nose.
Hoagies and grinders, hoagies and grinders
navy beans, navy beans, navy beans, navy beans.
hoagies and grinders, hoagies and grinders
navy beans, navy beans..MEATLOAF SANDWICH.

Sloppy joe slop sloppy joe yeah
Sloppy joe slop sloppy joe ooh-yeah

(with Chris Farley)

Sloppy joe slop sloppy joe yeah
Sloppy joe slop sloppy joe -YEAH

Then one morning that I woke up to see
aw the pepperoni pizza was lookin at me.

It screamed why do you burn me and serve me up cold,

I said a I got the spatula – just do what you’re told.
And the liver and onions started joining the fight
and the chocolate pudding pushed me with all its might
and the chop suey slapped me and it kicked me in the head
it’s called revenge LunchLady said the garlic bread

I said what did I do to make you all so mad?
You got flabby arms and your breath is bad.
And the green beans said you better run and hide

but then my friend Sloppy Joe came and joined my side.

He said if it wasn’t for the Lunch Lady the kids wouldn’t eat ya
You should be shakin’ her hand and sayin’ pleased to meet ya

She gives you a purpose and she gives you a goal

You should be kissin’ her feet or kissin’ her mole
Now all the angry food just leave me alone,
And we all live together in our happy home a thanks to
Sloppy Joe Slop Sloppy Joe yeah
Sloppy Joe Slop Sloppy Joe ooh yeah
Sloppy Joe Slop Sloppy Joe yeah
(slower) Sloppy Joe Slop Sloppy Joe well..

Me and Sloppy Joe got married.
We got six kids and we’re doin’ just fine.
Down in Lunch Lady Land

Transcribed by Richard Wludyga

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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