[ open on title card ]
Announcer: The following is a public service announcement from the producers of “The Flintstones”.[ dissolve to John Goodman dressed as Fred Flintstone on rock set ]
John Goodman: Hello. I’m John Goodman. Those of you familiar with “The Flintstones” have probably noticed that the characters often have names involving stones and rocks, such as Fred Flintstone, Barney Rubble, and even Mr. Slate. Obviously, this can be quite disconcerting to viewers here in the 20th Century. So I’m here tonight to uexplain the key to understanding Flintonstones names. You know, it’s actually quite simple. You see.. you just take a name, add the word “stone” or “rock” to it, and.. [ snaps finger ] presto! You’re a citizen of Bedrock![ holds up rock slab with “Roseanne Arnold” on it ] For example, my good friend Roseanne Arnold, in the Flintstones world, would be.. [ flips slab over ] ..Roseanne Arnstone. Understand? [ holds up rock slab with “Eric Johnson” on it ] While, if your name were Eric Johnson, you would be.. [ flips slab over ] ..Eric Rockson. [ holds up rock slab with “Lewis Bowen” on it ] And Lewis Bowen would be.. [ flips slab over ] ..Louis Boulder. You get it! It’s that simple! [ holds up rock slab with “Sharon Stone” on it ] Now, if Sharon Stone lived in Bedrock, her name would be.. [ flips slab over ] ..Sharon Miller.
I hope this clears things up. [ holds up rock slab with “John Goodman” on it ] I’m John Goodman, or you can call me by my Flintstones name.. [ flips slab over ] ..John D. Rockefeller.
Thank you.[ dissolve to title card ]
Announcer: This has been a public service announcement. But you can call it “a stone service rock.”[ fade ]