SNL Transcripts: Marisa Tomei: 10/01/94: Framington High Fall Mixer


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 20: Episode 2

94b: Marisa Tomei / Bonnie Raitt

Framington High Fall Mixer

Boy…..Adam Sandler
Girl…..Marisa Tomei
Black Guy…..Tim Meadows

[ open on interior, Framington High gymnasium during their Fall Mixer ] [ Background Music: “Freebird”, Lynyrd Skynyrd ] [ the crowds open up to reveal a high school couple slow dancing in a circular motion. Each one speaks as they make the spin to face the camera ]

Boy: I’m really glad we’re dancing together.

Girl: Me, too, you’re a good dancer.

Boy: It’s fun to dance.

Girl: Uh-huh. Can’t beat dancing.

Boy: Dancing is good and fun.

Girl: I was just about to say that.

Boy: Is it okay if I put my hands here? [ lowers his hands to Girl’s butt ]

Girl: O-kay..

Boy: Is it okay if I move them around?

Girl: Uhh.. no.

Boy: Your hair smells nice, what do you wash it with?

Girl: Well.. I wash it with Herbal Essence shampoo.. and then I put Sassoon conditioner on, for exactly fifteen minutes.. and then, before I rinse it out, I squoosh it in real good to the hair shaft.. and then, you-

Boy: [ quickly spins around so he can face the camera, cutting off Girl’s response ] O-o-okay.. Herbal Essence, and then the other one. I got it, thank you.

Girl: [ looks across the room with a disgusted look on her face ] Oh, gro-oss. That guy’s staring at me.

Boy: [ looking, assuming the role of a tough guy ] That little guy with the beard? I’ll beat his ass!

Girl: No, the big Puerto Rican guy next to him.

Boy: [ secretly scared ] I don’t think he’s staring at you. [ glances at the Puerto Rican guy ] Hola!

Girl: My parents are out at some play tonight. You wanna.. come over and hang out?

Boy: [ excited ] Yes!

Girl: Oh! What was that?

Boy: Sorry, uh.. that happens sometimes when I dance..

Girl: Well, can you make it not happen?

Boy: Yeah. Start talking about your shampoos again.

Girl: You know.. I heard there’s a guy in the Senior class.. who still sleeps in his Battlestar Galactica pajamas.

Boy: [ eyes shifting back and forth nervously ]

Girl: Turns out the lacrosse team found out who it was, and they’re coming over to beat the crap out of him.

Boy: [ puts a fake moustache over his lip ] Really? I hope they find the guy.

[ Black Guy enters scene ]

Black Guy: Excuse me, you mind if I cut in?

Boy: Not at all.

[ Boy and Girl seperate; the Black Guy begins to dance with the Boy, as the Girl steps aside and pouts to herself ]

Black Guy: I like your moustache.

Boy: Thanks.

Black Guy: Is it okay if I put my hands down here? [ puts his hands on Boy’s butt ]

Boy: Okayy..

Black Guy: Is it okay if I move them around?

[ fade ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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