SNL Transcripts: Martin Short: 12/07/96



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 22: Episode 8


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:


December 7th, 1996

Martin Short

No Doubt

None

Lorne Michaels

Chevy Chase
O.J. Simpson Child Custody HearingSummary: O.J. Simpson (Tim Meadows) gives the runaround at his child custody hearing.

Recurring Characters: O.J. Simpson.

Montage

Martin Short’s MonologueSummary: After contemplating what he wants his monologue to be about, Martin Short sings about “SNL”‘s peak-and-valley history.

First Hosted: 86f.

Celebrity Jeopardy!Summary: Dumb celebrities Sean Connery (Darrell Hammond), Jerry Lewis (Martin Short), and Burt Reynolds (Norm MacDonald) aggravate intellectual host Alex Trebek (Will Ferrell).

Recurring Characters: Alex Trebek, Sean Connery, Burt Reynolds, Jerry Lewis.

Transcript

Martha Stewart’s Topless Christmas SpecialSummary: The holiday special that centers around a half-naked Martha Stewart (Ana Gasteyer).

Recurring Characters: Martha Stewart.

Transcript

Ed Grimley in HeavenSummary: Merriwether (Chevy Chase), the gatekeeper of Heaven, sends Ed Grimley (Short) is sent back from the dead to get a life.

Recurring Characters: Ed Grimley.

Roxbury GuysSummary: Roxbury Guys (Will Ferrell, Chris Kattan) go club-hopping with foreignor Jaleel (Martin Short).

Recurring Characters: Doug Butabi, Steve Butabi.

Weekend Update with Norm MacDonaldSummary: Lenny the Lion (Colin Quinn) comments on the health care system.

Recurring Characters: Lenny The Lion.

Transcript

No Doubt performs “Don’t Speak”Also Performed: 01i.

The Barbara Walters SpecialSummary: Jackie Rogers, Jr. (Martin Short) recalls embarrassing moments during an interview with Barbara Walters (Cheri Oteri).

Recurring Characters: Barbara Walters, Jackie Rogers, Jr.

Larry Azaria’s Mostly Used Mattresses

The Terry Gantner Family WorkoutSummary: Karate expert Terry Gantner (Will Ferrell) breaks his hand while demonstrating a simple chop move, then screams his agony.

Transcript

The Tinseltown TattlerSummary: Pinky Nye (Martin Short) and Rhona Patton (Molly Shannon) gossip.

No Doubt performs “Excuse Me Mr.”

Happy Holiday TalesSummary: Mickey the Dyke (Cheri Oteri) tells her family that she’s a lesbian.

Recurring Characters: Mickey The Dyke.

Goodnights

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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