Maya Angelou Endorses Butterfingers
Maya Angelou…..David Alan Grier
Announcer: And now, Maya Angelou… for “Butterfingers”.
Maya Angelou: The wind. The rain. The fire.
Did the Caveman know your delicious goodness?
Did the Mayan Priest exhalt in your buttery crunchiness?
Did the slothful Mastodon, upon his extinction, declare,
“Don’t lay a finger on my Butterfinger?”
Oh, you finger of butter!
You proud confection!
Sugar brown roasted peanuts,
fructose, glucose, sucrose, lactose,
partially hydrogenated palm kernel oil.
Crispity, crunchity, peanut buttery–
I… give… myself… to… you.
Glad mantle of golden chocolaty hope upon my breast.
Thanks to Kevin Alexander Boyd for this transcript!