Mr. Cavanetti…..Chevy Chase
[ open in front of Andrew’s newsstand, as Mr. Cavanetti walks up ]
Andrew: Hey, morning, Mr. Cavanetti! How you doing?
Mr. Cavanetti: Morning, Alex.
Andrew: Andrew! The name’s Andrew.
Mr. Cavanetti: Andrew.. whatever. The Times, please.
Andrew: Yeah, here you go. [ pulls it out of his coat pocket ] Kept one warm for you, Mr. Cavanetti!
Mr. Cavanetti: Oh, thank you very much, kept one warm for me, well that’s..
Andrew: Hey! Did you see the Chopper 4 on TV today, Mr. Cavanetti!
Mr. Cavanetti: No.. I didn’t.
Andrew: Ya! Chopper 4 was flying all over the place! Chopper 4 saw a lot of traffic, ho boy!
Mr. Cavanetti: [ uncomfortable with this conversation ] Yeah.. I.. I.. I.. it’s a good thing I walked today!
Andrew: Yeah! It’s a good thing you walked today! Hey! did you hear that Chopper 4’s got a new camera! Yeah! It can see through fog!
Mr. Cavanetti: Yeah, I think I did hear that somewhere..
Andrew: I told you about it!
Mr. Cavanetti: Oh.
Andrew: Yeah! It couldn’t used to see through no fog!
Mr. Cavanetti: Chopper 4?
Andrew: Yeah! Hey, you know what?
Mr. Cavanetti: No.
Andrew: Channel 5.. it ain’t got no Chopper 4!
Mr. Cavanetti: I’m willing to bet that Channel doesn’t have a Chopper 4, either.
Andrew: Yeah, you’re right! I just found out about Channel 5 today!
Mr. Cavanetti: You did?
Mr. Cavanetti: Ah. Gotta go, Albert..
Mr. Cavanetti: Oh. Andrew. Sorry.
Andrew: Where you going, Mr. Cavanetti?
Mr. Cavanetti: Huh? Oh, uh.. I just gotta meet my wife for a movie uptown.
Andrew: Oh, yeah! Are you two of you’s gonna go see Chopper 4!
Mr. Cavanetti: Geez.. No. We’re going to see a movie. you know, one of those big IMAX movies.
Andrew: Oh, IMAX! Those are like magic movies! Hey! You know what would make a great IMAX movie, Mr. Cavanetti!
Mr. Cavanetti: Chopper 4?
Andrew: Yeah, Chopper 4! You could see through the fog in 3D! I wonder what that would be like!
Mr. Cavanetti: Okay, Gordon..
Mr. Cavanetti: Right.. well.. I’m gonna be late for the movie..
Andrew: Hey! You know, I went to an IMAX movie once, Mr. Cavenetti, I didn’t even make it into the theater! The poster gave the dizzies, I had to lie down on the sidewalk!
Mr. Cavanetti: [ confused ] You had to what?
Andrew: Yeah, yeah! The cold concrete makes the dizzies go away!
Mr. Cavanetti: Well.. maybe you should just stick to Chopper 4 on TV.
Andrew: Yeah! Well, I plan on doing that! Most definitely! Watching in my basement apartment with my fourteen cats – Alan, Sidney, Chopper 4, Bridget..
Mr. Cavanetti: Well.. you know what, Andrew..?
Mr. Cavanetti: Andrew. A friend of mine is a news director over there at Channel 4..
Andrew: [ excited ] What?!
Mr. Cavanetti: Maybe I could, uh..
Andrew: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Does he know Chopper 4!
Mr. Cavanetti: Well, the station owns Chopper 4..
Andrew: Hey, no one could own Chopper 4, Mr. Cavanetti! It can see through fog!
Mr. Cavanetti: So I hear.
Andrew: Yeah! You think your friend could let me meet Chopper 4!
Mr. Cavanetti: Well, maybe.. let me talk to him, we’ll see..
Andrew: [ swooning ] Oh.. I’m getting the dizzies.. I gotta lie down on the sidewalk now.. [ lays down ]
Mr. Cavanetti: Slow down.. easy boy.. it’s gonna be fine..
Andrew: Oh, Mr. Cavanetti.. thank you so much.. thank you so much for getting me a ride on Chopper 4..
Mr. Cavanetti: I don’t think there’ll actually be a ride, but maybe you can sit in it while it’s on the ground..
Andrew: Oh, sitting in it will do! Thank you very much, Mr. Cavanetti! [ pulls at his hand ]
Mr. Cavanetti: Okay, no problem.. [ swats Andrew’s hand with his newspaper ] Gotta get going.. take care. [ walks off ] [ cut to newspaper headline “Man Steals Chopper Four, Whereabouts Unknown” with Andrew’s picture next to it ] [ cut to Chopper 4 flying the the skies of New York ]
Andrew’s Voice: Wow! I’m riding in Chopper 4! I can see through fog![ fade ]