SNL Transcripts: Brendan Fraser: 10/18/97: The Shark Channel


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 23: Episode 3

97c: Brendan Fraser / Bjork

The Shark Channel

[ Shark Channel logo appears ]

Announcer: Tonight on The Shark Channel – cable’s only network to feature all-shark programming..

[ show images of sharks swimming through the water, eating chum, etc. ]

Announcer: Their jaws average two feet in width, and act like a deadly vise. Tonight at 9:00 on The Shark Channel: “Great White: Inside the Jaws of Death.”

[ logo: “Great White: Jaws of Death” ]

Announcer: The, at 10:00: their teeth average two inches in length, and can slice flesh like a razor: “Great White: Teeth of Terror” ] [ logo: “Great White: Teeth of Terror” ] [ logo: “The Shark Report” ]

Announcer: Then, every night at 11:00: it’s The Shark Report. Get information on sharks..

[ show shark swimming below 5-day weather accu-cast ]

Announcer: well as the latest weather! With The Shark Channel’s Accu-Cast Radar 4000.

[ show shark swimming above a scrolling stock report ]

Announcer: ..Financial news, with The Shark Channel’s stock report!

[ show shark swimming alongside Hanson in a box ]

Announcer: And find out what’s hot in Hollywood, with The Shark Channel’s entertainment watch.

[ show logo: “Cooking With Ramona” ]

Announcer: Then, it’s time for “Cooking with Ramona.” Tonight, Chef Ramona explores some creative ways to cook with chum.

[ show shark swimming with “Season Premiere” logo ]

Announcer: Then, get ready to laugh, with The Shark Channel’s freshest sitcom – “Roscoe -N- The Boyz”.

[ show logo: “Roscoe -N- The Boyz” ] [ show logo: “The Midnight Hour Starring A Tiger Shark”” ]

Announcer: ..followed by the hot, new late night talk show – “The Midnight Hour Starring A Tiger Shark”.

[ show tiger shark eating a bloodied human carcass ]

Announcer: Tonight: “Men Behaving Badly”‘s Rob Schneider drops in.

[ show shark scientist assisting in a shark birth ]

Announcer: Tuesday at 9:00, The Shark Channel tackles the sensitive subject of teen pregnancy, as only we can in.. “Without Parental Consent”. A Shark Channel original movie.

[ show logo: “Without Parental Consent” ] [ show logo: “The 47th Annual Country Music Awards” ]

Announcer: And, tomorrow – be sure to catch the 47th Annual Country Music Awards! With host Jeff Foxworthy! And appearances by: Clint Black.. LeAnn Rimes.. Garth Brooks.. Alabama.. and a special performance by Willie Nelson.

[ show more footage of shark activity ]

Announcer: It’s a night of music and surprises, only on The Shark Channel!

[ Shark Channel logo re-appears ]

Announcer: The Shark Channel. We took the idea of a Shark Network.. and ran with it.

[ fade ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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