Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 24: Episode 12
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Air Date:Host:Musical Guest:Special Guests:Cameos:
February 6th, 1999
Gwyneth Paltrow
Barenaked Ladies
None
Tina Fey
Paula Pell
Ben Affleck
A Message From the President of the United StatesSummary: President Bill Clinton’s (Darrell Hammond) and various members of his cabinet make the empty promise that they will not gloat.
Recurring Characters: President Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Al Gore, Monica Lewinsky, Vernon Jordan, Betty Currie.
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Montage
Gwyneth Paltrow’s MonologueSummary: Ben Affleck has to remind Gwyneth Paltrow that she’s not British.
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E! Impeachment CoverageRecurring Characters: Todd Newton, Melissa Rivers, Sharon Stone, Trent Lott, Bob Barr, Betty Currie, Andy Dick, William Rehnquist.
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Behind The Music: Joan JettSummary: Joan Jett (Gwyneth Paltrow) recalls unpleasant inspirations for her songs and videos.
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Mary Katharine GallagherSummary: Mary Katherine Gallagher (Molly Shannon) wants to join the Black Angels.
Recurring Characters: Mary Katherine Gallagher.
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Behind The Music: John OatesSummary: John Oates (Chris Kattan) explains how he innovated clapping in his music.
Recurring Characters: John Oates.
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Mindy & SkyeSummary: Mindy (Jimmy Fallon) cuts Skye (Gwyneth Paltrow) a lot of slack for her pitiful singing skills.
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TV FunhouseSummary: The X-Presidents.
Staten Island Nurses
E!Summary: Trent Lott (Darrell Hammond) announces: “You’re watching E!”
Recurring Characters: Trent Lott.
Weekend Update with Colin QuinnRecurring Characters: Vernon Jordan.
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Barenaked Ladies performs “It’s All Been Done”
Doing VoicesSummary: James (Will Ferrell) finds the funny voices of Margaret (Molly Shannon) and the rest of the Healy Family amusing at first.
Recurring Characters: Margaret Healy.
Behind The Music: Colin Hay
A&E BiographySummary: Fired Jack Perkins (Darrell Hammond) smears his replacement host, Harry Smith.
Recurring Characters: Jack Perkins, Peter Graves, Paula Zahn.
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Senate VotingSummary: Judge William Rehnquist (Will Ferrell) is desperate to break the Democrat vs. Republican party deadlock.
Recurring Characters: William Rehnquist, Trent Lott, Tom Brokaw, Mary Bono, Tom Daschle.
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Hardcore Rock
GoodnightsTranscript
