SNL Transcripts: Bill Murray: 02/20/99: Steve Baxter Hollywood Gynecologist



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 24: Episode 14


98n: Bill Murray / Lucinda Williams

Steve Baxter Hollywood Gynecologist

Steve Baxter….Bill Murray
Las Vegas Lounge Singer….Chris Parnell

[Opens with a Las Vegas Lounge Singer holding a microphone]

Las Vegas Lounge Singer: New in town? Finding the best gynecologist in town can be hard. Right? Well, not anymore. Check this out!

[Music plays, sings]

“Hey!
This guy is hot,
he’ll hit the spot
with all he’s gooot!
Steve Baxter! Hollywood Gynecologist!

Call him up!
Come on in!
Get nuuuuude!
He plays it fair,
but just beware,
he likes to staaaaaaaare!
Steve Baxter! Hollywood Gynecologist!

Drive by!
Show your pie!
Feel gooood!”

Now ladies and gentlemen! Here he is! The Baxman himself!

[Curtains rolls sideways revealing Steve Baxter sitting on a patients chair]

Steve Baxter: My name is Steve Baxter. I’m a licensed OB/GYN. My buddies say that’s just a fancy way of saying you like to sneak a peek. But hey! I don’t go talk to my buds about it. That’s not my style. My style is more confidential-like. That’s why some pretty tony ladies have come in and slipped out of their unitards in my office. I’m talking about ladies like…Miss Stockard Channing, Marilu Henner, our own Dyan Cannon, Jeanne Tripplehorn twice. And a national treasure, Miss Katherine Hepburn. In case you’re wondering they’re all more than just fine. So, you see, you may as well drop right in, let me check you out. After all, I’m a doctor. Oh, yeah. One more thing. In case you’re wondering…I do date my patients.

[cheers and applause]

[fade]

Submitted by: Waldo San Miguel

SNL Transcripts

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