SNL Transcripts: Ray Romano: 03/13/99



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 24: Episode 15


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:


March 13th, 1999

Ray Romano

The Corrs

None

Peter Boyle

Doris Roberts
Barbara Walters Tries Phone SexSummary: Inspired by her interview with Monica Lewinsky, Barbara Walters (Cheri Oteri) phones fellow public figures with the hopes of initiating phone sex.

Recurring Characters: Barbara Walters, Tom Bokaw, Sean Connery, Hillary Clinton.

Montage

Ray Romano’s MonologueSummary: Ray Romano’s stand-up performance about his children is interrupted by TV parents Peter Boyle and Doris Roberts, who come bearing clips of themselves.

Transcript

SportsCenterSummary: New sports anchor Chet Harper’s (Ray Romano) catch phrases aren’t as successful as those used by Stuart Scott (Tim Meadows).

Recurring Characters: Stuart Scott, Chet Harper.

Transcript

VH-1 Behind the Music: Meat LoafSummary: Meat Loaf (Horatio Sanz) mentions other warning signs that he plans to turn into songs.

Recurring Characters: Meat Loaf

Roberto Benigni at Carnabie’sSummary: Diners at Carnabie’s Restaurant don’t seem to mind the obnoxious antics of Roberto Benigni (Ray Romano) when he makes a surprise visit.

Transcript

Pimp ChatSummary: New York cop Pretty Tony (Ray Romano) chats with Bishop Don “Mack” Donald (Tracy Morgan) and Pimpin’ Kyle (Tim Meadows).

Recurring Characters: Bishop Don “Mack” Donald, Pimpin’ Kyle.

Weekend Update with Colin QuinnSummary: Monica Lewinsky (Molly Shannon) can’t stop laughing while discussing her book. Cheri Oteri uses a Barbie doll to illustrate the troubled history of women.

Recurring Characters: Monica Lewinsky.

Transcript

The Corrs perform “What Can I Do?”

Suel ForrestorSummary: NCAA coach Suel Forrestor (Chris Kattan) mumbles while delivering a pep talk to his team.

Recurring Characters: Suel Forrestor.

The Big BabySummary: Salesman Jim Lasterbick (Will Ferrell) breaks down and cries like a baby when his ad campaign goes awry.

Transcript

The Corrs perform “So Young”

Petracelli’s DreamsSummary: While hiding in a foxhole during World War II, Petracelli (Ray Romano) tells his fellow soldiers of the plans he has in store for after the war.

Transcript

GoodnightsTranscript

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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