March 11th, 2000
The Statler Brothers
Newsmen Phone ChatSummary: Ted Koppel (Darrell Hammond), Tom Brokaw (Chris Parnell) and Bernard Shaw (Tim Meadows) express their dismay in the probability of a Bush and Gore election.
Recurring Characters: Ted Koppel, Tom Brokaw, Bernard Shaw.
Joshua Jackson’s MonologueSummary: Joshua Jackson promises that tonight’s teen-based episode will one day become memorable in retrospect.
Hamburger Helper AntibacterialNote: Repeat from 01/08/00.
Regis Co-Host AuditionsSummary: In the wake of Kathie Lee Gifford’s departure, Regis Philbin (Darrell Hammond) auditions for a new sidekick.
Recurring Characters: Regis Philbin, Gellman, Star Jones, Barbara Walters, Donny Osmond.
Wedding SingersSummary: A pair of wedding singers just barely know one song: “(I Just) Died In Your Arms Tonight).”
On the Road with the BoysSummary: The members of 7 Degrees Celsius meet their biggest fan (Joshua Jackson).
Recurring Characters: Emily De La Cruz, Sara Therese Longo, Jeph, Samm, Wade, Sweet T, Peter Tanner.
Lez It upSummary: When a group of frat boys make a wish for lesbians, the results are not the wild event they expected.
Weekend Update with Colin QuinnSummary: Writer Kevin Brennan lists the differences between presidential frontrunners George W. Bush and Al Gore.
*NSYNC performs “Bye Bye Bye”
Let’s Talk BooksSummary: Panelists discuss a list of bestsellers that are comprised of books with naughty title and author combinations.
Collette ReardonSummary: Pill-popping Collette Reardon (Cheri Oteri) visits her nephew’s (Joshua Jackson) prep school.
Recurring Characters: Collette Reardon.
Neil Armstrong: The Ohio YearsSummary: In a film by Adam McKay, Neil Armstrong is obsessed with the memory of walking on the moon.
*NSYNC performs “I Thought She Knew”
Three-Way CoupleSummary: Warren Kirney (Chris Parnell) asks the yardboy (Joshua Jackson) to join him and Fran (Ana Gasteyer) in a three-way.
Recurring Characters: Warren Kirney, Fran Kirney.