Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 25: Episode 14
Joshua Jackson’s Monologue
Don Pardo V/O: Ladies and gentlemen – Joshua Jackson!
Joshua Jackson: I’ve gotta say, it is great to be here in New York City! My name is Joshua Jackson, I play Pacey on the show “Dawson’s Creek”, in case you didn’t know.
Now, if you are a teenage girl, I’m fairly confident you’ve heard of me, and also, the musical guest, N*Sync. And, if you’re the parent of a teenage girl, you might vaguely know who I am. And, if you’re a man in his forties who doesn’t have kids but still volunteers to coach Little League.. you definitely know who I am, and, please, please, stop sending me letters.
Okay, but I really want to talk to people who aren’t familiar with my work or N*Sync, and I just want to say to them – we’re gonna do a great show, just give us a chance! Especially you hipsters in your mid-twenties, who think you’re too cool to watch tonight’s show. I mean, come on, get off your high horse, okay? I mean, think back, ten years ago, how excited you would have been if Jason Priestly and Color Me Badd would have been on the show – you loved it! And that’s what this is like!
And, if you’re in your thirties, think back fifteen years ago – it’s like if Kirk Cameron hosted and Frankie Goes To Hollywood was the musical guest. I know that doesn’t sound god, but, for some reason, in the mid-eighties, it was.
And, if you were a teenager when the show first started, think how you felt when you found out that John Travolta and ABBA were on the show, right? That sounds like a great show, but it never happened! That’s just how you remembered it. Because you always remember this stuff as better than it was. This is the show they actually had:[ cut to fake footage of the 1978 season opening montage ]
Don Pardo V/O: Tonight’s musical guest: Foghat. And your host: Epstein, from “Welcome Back, Kotter”.[ cut back to Joshua Jackson’s monologue ]
Joshua Jackson: And that was a great show! And that’s what I’m trying to tell you people! We have a great show tonight – *NSYNC is here! So stick around, and we’ll be right back!