SNL Transcripts: Joshua Jackson: 03/11/00: Joshua Jackson’s Monologue

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 25: Episode 14

99n: Joshua Jackson / *NSYNC

Joshua Jackson’s Monologue

…..Joshua Jackson

Don Pardo V/O: Ladies and gentlemen – Joshua Jackson!

Joshua Jackson: I’ve gotta say, it is great to be here in New York City! My name is Joshua Jackson, I play Pacey on the show “Dawson’s Creek”, in case you didn’t know.

Now, if you are a teenage girl, I’m fairly confident you’ve heard of me, and also, the musical guest, N*Sync. And, if you’re the parent of a teenage girl, you might vaguely know who I am. And, if you’re a man in his forties who doesn’t have kids but still volunteers to coach Little League.. you definitely know who I am, and, please, please, stop sending me letters.

Okay, but I really want to talk to people who aren’t familiar with my work or N*Sync, and I just want to say to them – we’re gonna do a great show, just give us a chance! Especially you hipsters in your mid-twenties, who think you’re too cool to watch tonight’s show. I mean, come on, get off your high horse, okay? I mean, think back, ten years ago, how excited you would have been if Jason Priestly and Color Me Badd would have been on the show – you loved it! And that’s what this is like!

And, if you’re in your thirties, think back fifteen years ago – it’s like if Kirk Cameron hosted and Frankie Goes To Hollywood was the musical guest. I know that doesn’t sound god, but, for some reason, in the mid-eighties, it was.

And, if you were a teenager when the show first started, think how you felt when you found out that John Travolta and ABBA were on the show, right? That sounds like a great show, but it never happened! That’s just how you remembered it. Because you always remember this stuff as better than it was. This is the show they actually had:

[ cut to fake footage of the 1978 season opening montage ]

Don Pardo V/O: Tonight’s musical guest: Foghat. And your host: Epstein, from “Welcome Back, Kotter”.

[ cut back to Joshua Jackson’s monologue ]

Joshua Jackson: And that was a great show! And that’s what I’m trying to tell you people! We have a great show tonight – *NSYNC is here! So stick around, and we’ll be right back!

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