Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 25: Episode 17
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Air Date:Host:Musical Guest:Special Guests:Cameos:
April 15th, 2000
Tobey Maguire
Sisqo
None
Lorne Michaels
Adam McKay
Clarence “Gatemouth” Brown
Steve Buscemi
The Studio 8-H RulesSummary: Tobey Maguire recites the studio’s rules to the cast members.
Transcript
Montage
Tobey Maguire’s MonologueSummary: Tobey Maguire has to endure the antics of audience member, Keith (Adam McKay), who mistakes him for the movie “Jerry Maguire”.
Recurring Characters: Keith.
Transcript
Celebrity Jeopardy!Summary: Sean Connery (Darrell Hammond) vs. Hilary Swank (Jimmy Fallon) and Keanu Reeves (Tobey Maguire).
Recurring Characters: Alex Trebek, Sean Connery, Keanu Reeves, Ricky Martin, Chad Lowe.
Transcript
Burger CastleSummary: Nadeen (Cheri Oteri) quiets down customers at Burger Castle by telling them to “Simmer down now!”
Recurring Characters: Nadeen.
Transcript
TV FunhouseSummary: Rob Smigel has some “Fun With Real Audio”.
Inside The Actor’s StudioSummary: James Lipton (Will Ferrell) is enamored by former “Saved by the Bell” second banana, Dustin Diamond (Tobey Maguire).
Recurring Characters: James Lipton, Dustin Diamond.
Transcript
Attebury Tennis LessonRecurring Characters: Ginger Attebury, Leslie Attebury.
Weekend Update with Colin QuinnRecurring Characters: Angelina Jolie, James Haven Voight, Qrplt*xk, Joy Lipton.
Sisqo performs “The Thong Song”
Yoga ClassSummary: A yoga student (Will Ferrell) fulfills his dream of achieving oral self-gratification.
Transcript
Stavenhagen’s Pawn ShopSummary: A film by Adam McKay.
Porno Magazines
WestlinkSummary: A company so advanced that even they don’t know what they do.
Transcript
GoodnightsTranscript
