SNL Transcripts: Britney Spears: 05/13/00

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 25: Episode 19


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:


May 13th, 2000

Britney Spears

Britney Spears

None

Sarah Michelle Geller

Cheri Oteri’s mother
Guiliani’s Press ConferenceSummary: Hillary Clinton (Ana Gasteyer) speaks out in favor of Mayor Rudolph Guiliani’s (Darrell Hammond) extramarital affair.

Recurring Characters: Mayor Rudolph Guiliani, Hillary Clinton.

Transcript

Montage

Britney Spears’ MonologueSummary: Britney Spears denies rumors that she lip-syncs and has breast implants.

Also Hosted: 01l.

Transcript

Gap FatSummary: A fat dancer (Horatio Sanz) leads other fat dancers in a musical campaign for the Gap’s new XXL wear collection.

Transcript

Morning LatteSummary: Tom Wilkins (Will Ferrell) and a hoarse Cass van Rye (Cheri Oteri) interview Mickey Mouse Club reject Dawn Paslowsky (Britney Spears).

Recurring Characters: Tom Wilkins, Cass van Rye.

Transcript

Boston TeensSummary: Sully (Jimmy Fallon) and Denise (Rachel Dratch) joke around with the milk maiden (Britney Spears) at a coloniel museum.

Recurring Characters: Sully, Denise, Frank.

Transcript

TV FunhouseSummary: In a Rob Smigel cartoon, The Ambiguously Gay Duo foil a Big Head plot at the NBA Finals.

Transcript

WoodrowSummary: Britney Spears enjoys a romantic moment in the sewer with Woodrow the homeless bum (Tracy Morgan).

Recurring Characters: Woodrow.

Transcript

Britney Spears performs “Oops!…I Did It Again”Also Performed: 01l, 03c.

Weekend Update with Colin QuinnSummary: A shy Chris Parnell raps about his dream date with Britney Spears.

Recurring Characters: James Haven Voight, Angelina Jolie, Qrplt*xk.

Transcript

The DeMarco BrothersSummary: Brothers Kyle (Chris Kattan) and Sean DeMarco (Chris Parnell) perform bad dance moves while auditioning for Britney Spears.

Recurring Characters: Kyle DeMarco, Sean DeMarco.

Transcript

America’s Worst MomentsSummary: From Elian Gonzalez to Oliver North, America’s worst moments are commemorated on a series of decorative plates.

Transcript

Deandra Wells Comeback TourSummary: Diva Deandra Wells (Ana Gasteyer) mocks the members of her back-up band (Will Ferrell, Chris Parnell, Horatio Sanz) during her big comeback tour.

Recurring Characters: Deandra Wells, Gordon Davis, Alan “Sticks” McRae, Donny Gordon.

Transcript

Uncle Jemima’s Pure Mash LiquorNote: Repeat from 02/05/00.

Britney Spears performs “Don’t Let Me Be The Last To Know”

GoodnightsTranscript

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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