SNL Transcripts: Britney Spears: 05/13/00: The Demarco Brothers


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 25: Episode 19

99s: Britney Spears

The Demarco Brothers

…..Britney Spears
Assistant…..Tim Meadows
Kyle Demarco…..Chris Kattan
Sean Demarco…..Chris Parnell
Dancer…..Ana Gasteyer

(Dancer finishes up audition)

Britney Spears: Uh, thank you, great moves. We’ll keep in touch alright?

Dancer: Ok, thank you

Britney Spears: Who’s next?

Assistant: Uh, Kyle Demarco, and his brother Sean Demarco

Kyle DeMarco: (furiously shaking Britney’s hand) Oh my God, Hi, Hi, how are you? Oh my God Hi, hi, nice to meet you

Sean DeMarco: Let me shake her hand.

Kyle DeMarco: Oh my God my heart’s going crazy

Sean DeMarco: Oh my God you just said “crazy” like her song

Kyle DeMarco: Oh my God, I totally did, I didn’t mean to do that, oh my God!

Assistant: Ok guys, calm down. Calm down guys

Britney Spears: Ok, look guys I’m going on tour very soon and I’m looking for dancers with a lot of energy.

Assistant: Right so, uh, let’s see what you guys got.

Kyle DeMarco: Ok…(referring to shirt) Give it up…

Sean DeMarco: For Britney…You know it…

Kyle DeMarco: TOTALLY! (laughs)

Britney Spears: Those are nice.

Sean DeMarco: We stayed up all night making them

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah we totally missed Felicity….ah ok ok ok

(They get a serious look on their faces and they turn to each other)

Kyle DeMarco: Freedom

Sean DeMarco: Freedom

Kyle DeMarco: Trust

Sean DeMarco: Trust

Kyle DeMarco: Wings

Sean DeMarco: Wings

Kyle DeMarco: Give it up!

Sean DeMarco: Woo!

(Beginning of “Oops, I Did it Again” plays then breaks into chorus-while that is playing, the Demarco Brothers are doing dance moves related to the lyrics of the song)

Kyle DeMarco: Oh my God,Oh my God you were so good

Sean DeMarco: No you were so good

Kyle DeMarco: I know totally I was, I was totally good I know that!

Britney Spears: That was really interesting guys, um, you wanna show me something else?

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah, if you just give us a second here we will. God, what is that?

Sean DeMarco: You ok-you ok?

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah I’m fine, I’m fine…how are my bangs?

Sean DeMarco: They could be longer-uh-how are my pot marks?

Kyle DeMarco: You can’t see them.

Britney Spears: You guys we really have a lot of other people to see-

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah, I know, ok, God, I know this, ok, God, what is this?…Ok…Let’s do this

Sean DeMarco: For Britney

Kyle DeMarco: (points to shirt) Totally!

(“You Drive Me Crazy” plays-the Brothers do motions to the sound of the bells with their heads and hips…Britney stops music)

Kyle DeMarco: Uh, oh, uuuuh!

Britney Spears: Ok, you guys were just wobbling

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah, ok and you just interrupted us. Thank you very much!

Assistant: You guys got something else you can show us?

Britney Spears: Yeah guys we’re really running out of time.

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah, ok Little Miss Pissy, how ’bout you watch your lip?!

Sean DeMarco: Hey Kyle!

Kyle DeMarco: I just don’t get it you know?

Sean DeMarco: Kyle?

Kyle DeMarco: What?

Sean DeMarco: Look at me. Look at me. You take that fire that’s going on inside of you right now, and you put it into the dance! Alright?

Kyle DeMarco: Ok, ok.

Sean DeMarco: Remember what Nanny Demarco said, “If you dream, dream out loud”

Kyle DeMarco: Ok.

Assistant: That’s really great you guys but, uh, we gotta keep this thing moving because if we don’t, I may have to shoot myself in the face.

Britney Spears: Yeah, you guys wannna try another number or something?

Kyle DeMarco: Yeah, we will, if you just give us a second ok? Uh, what, uh?

Sean DeMarco: I know, terrible.

(Puts on “Hit Me Baby One More Time” attire…plays song…Brothers start to dance around the table and then start spinning…Britney stops the music)

Britney Spears: Ok, you guys were just spinning. That was awful!

Kyle DeMarco: (crying)

Sean DeMarco: What do you want from us? Do you want us to BLEED?!

Kyle DeMarco: (crying) This business is so hard, it is so hard!

Sean DeMarco: I know, I know. Come on let’s just go buy some headbands or something ok?

Kyle DeMarco: Ok…YOU PEOPLE!!!

Assistant: Man those guys were terrible.

Britney Spears: Totally…oh my God!

Assistant: Well, the next audition isn’t for another hour, you wanna practice the new number?

Britney Spears: Yeah, sure.

Assistant: Alright.

(Turns on “You Drive Me Crazy”)

Assistant: Wobble, Wobble, Wobble, Wobble, Wobble, Wobble, now spin, spin, spin, yeah.

(fades to black)

Submitted by: Mia Velarde

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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