Director… Alex Moffat
Coach… Kenan Thompson
Robbie… Pete Davidson
[Starts with a basketball court there people are filming]
[The actors are getting ready. Director walks in.]
Director: Alright, fellas. This is my favorite scene in the film. Okay? Sort of the core of these character’s relationship.
Coach: Yeah. Like, the coach is becoming a father figure here?
Director: Absolutely. Alright, so, I’m gonna stay our of your way. Let the geniuses do their thing. Okay. Here we go, guys. [walking backwards] Hey, background, do me a flavor. Just play some ball, pass it, you know the drill. Alright, here we go, guys. Ready, background, action.
Male voice: Rolling sound. Rolling, rolling.
[gets back to his seat]
Director: And action.
[Cut to Robbie playing basketball with his friends. Coach walks in and looks at him.]
Coach: Hey, Robbie.
Robbie: Coach Stan. What are you doing here?
Coach: I came to see if everything was okay. We missed you at our tryouts today.
Robbie: I had some stuff I had to do.
[in the background, two guys are just passing the ball to each other lazily]
Coach: Look, Robbie, you’re good. You’re gonna have scouts lined up to give you a full right to the school. You’re just gonna throw that all away?
Robbie: What are you? My dad now?
Director: Cut! Sorry guys, stay in the zone. Hey, basketball players.
Mikey: What’s up?
Director: So, right now, your’e just sort of passing back and forth and it looks a little bit weird. Just play basketball, you know what I mean? Just dribble, pass, run some plays, okay?
Jimmy: Alright, sir.
Mikey: Thank you.
Director: [running back to his seat] Sorry guys. We’re taking it from the top. And action.
Robbie: Coach Stan.
Jimmy: Pass it up.
Robbie: What are you doing here?
Jimmy: Go get the ball.
Coach: I came to see if everything was okay. We missed you at tryouts today.
[Jimmy and Mikey are playing very loudly]
Robbie: I had some stuff I had to do.
Coach: Look, Robbie, you’re good. [Jimmy and Mikey are playing very loudly] You will have scouts lined up and waiting to give you a full right to the school. You’re just going to throw that all away?
Robbie: Why are you doing this?
Coach: Because I believe in you. So much so that I set up a second day in tryout. This Friday, four PM.
Director: And cut. Hey, basketball dudes? Looking just a little sloppy right now. We asked about basketball experience.
Mikey: Oh, yes. Um, I took a sports movement class.
Jimmy: I was in the stage production of Basketball Diaries.
Director: Ah! Forget it. Never mind. It’s all good.
Jimmy: Thank you sir.
Mikey: Thank you.
Director: And we’re on and action!
Robbie: Why are you doing this?
Jimmy: Slam it! Pass her up!
[Jimmy falls down very hard at the background.]
Coach: I believed in you. So much so–
[The basketball players are hugging]
Director: Okay, guys, stop hugging, please.
[Cut to many short video cuts because the background basketball players are messing up the shooting.]
Director: I don’t know what that is but stop.
Mikey: Sir, the ball popped.
Director: I see. We’ll get it in post. Keep going guys. It’s all good.
[the background basketball players are hurting themselves getting hit by the ball]
Director: Alright, can we get a medic? Don’t look into the camera, pal! [Coach and Robbie are looking at the background basketball players angrily.] Keep going guys!
Coach: I’m here because I believe. I mean, so much so that I set up a second–
Director: Please don’t take your shoes off, guys.
[the background basketball players are fighting]
Guys, stop fighting! Background, hey, sorry. We will have to lose you. Sorry guys.
[Jimmy kicks the ball, and this time he scores it.]
Yeah, you guys are still fired!