Music Box | Season 44 Episode 21

Cecily Strong

Kyle Mooney

Emily

Storekeeper… Paul Rudd

Kenan Thompson

[Starts with people in an antiques store] Cecily Strong: What a beautiful antiques store.

Kyle Mooney: Honey, look at this old sign. [Cut to Cecily Strong and Kyle Mooney] It says, ‘I only drink on days that start with T. Tuesday, Thursday, Today, Tomorrow, Thaturday, Thunday.

Cecily Strong: That’s hilarious. We probably don’t need that since you’re not drinking anymore.

Kyle Mooney: Oh, right.

Cecily Strong: You do remember that conversation?

Kyle Mooney: Yeah, sure. Hey, look what Emily found.

[Cut to everybody]

Emily: Look!

Cecily Strong: Oh! [Cut to Cecily Strong, Emily and Kyle Mooney] Look, it’s a music box with a ballerina on top. You know, my grandmother had one of these.

[Cut to everybody]

Storekeeper: Oh, that’s a wonderful choice. [Store keeper walks to them] They don’t make them like that anymore. And very affordable.

Cecily Strong: Our daughter just started ballet lessons.

Kyle Mooney: She’s not very good.

Cecily Strong: $60? I don’t know.

[Cut to the storekeeper]

Storekeeper: Wind the bottom and she’ll dance for you.

[Cut to Cecily Strong, Emily and Kyle Mooney] [Cecily Strong winds the bottom] [music playing]

Kyle Mooney: Oh, wow. Don’t you wish you could dance like that, sweetie?

Cecily Strong: The song is so pretty. Do you know the name of it?

[Cut to the storekeeper]

Storekeeper: Of course. It’s ‘Fancy party’.

[Cut to Cecily Strong, Emily and Emily]

Kyle Mooney: ‘Fancy party’? I don’t know that.

[Cut to the storekeeper]

Storekeeper: Sure you do. It’s a famous old beautiful song. Wind it again and let’s see if I remember the words.

[Cut to everybody] [Cecily Strong winds the bottom] [music playing] [Cut to the storekeeper]

Storekeeper: It started, the fancy party’s finally getting started

nothing can go wrong, owe wait, I farted,

I farted, now my whole world will never be the same.

[Cut to everybody]

And that’s ‘fancy party’.

[Cut to Cecily Strong, Emily and Emily]

Kyle Mooney: Hang on. The song ‘Fancy Party’ is about a ballerina having gas at a party?

[Cut to the storekeeper]

Storekeeper: That’s right. And the catastrophic effect it has on her life, relationships and dancing career.

[Cut to Cecily Strong, Emily and Emily]

Kyle Mooney: That’s not real.

[Cut to everybody]

Storekeeper: Sure it is. Your grandmother probably sang it to you while you went to sleep. Wind it again, you’ll remember.

[Cecily Strong winds the bottom] [music playing] [Cut to the storekeeper]

I beefed one,

they hired me for dancing, then I beefed one

it was oh, [Cut to everybody] so very long and not a brief one

because I beefed one

Now this whole fancy party knows my name

Cecily Strong: Wait I do know this.

[Cut to Cecily Strong and Storekeeper]

Cecily Strong and Storekeeper: I gave them quite a scare

when I jumped up in the air

and out a fruity rooty came

Storekeeper: I knew you knew it.

[Cut to everybody]

Kyle Mooney: I’m sorry if you’re eating

but my tights just took a beating

Everybody: And now I fear I’ll never dance again

[Cut to Kenan Thompson]

Kenan Thompson: I farted.

[Cut to everybody]

Storekeeper: Hello.

Kenan Thompson: I was just passing by and heard ‘Fancy party”.

Everybody: Did you hear the news how I done farted?

Now the party has sadly been departed

because I farted

That’s just how it goes.

Kyle Mooney: Wow.

Cecily Strong: That’s good.

Storekeeper: Memories.

Kyle Mooney: I’m glad you didn’t sing, honey. You would have messed it up.

Emily: Sing it again.

Cecily Strong: Let’s do it.

[Cecily Strong breaks the music box trying to wind it]

oh! No! Did I break it?

Storekeeper: What have you done?

Kyle Mooney: Honey, what have you done?

Cecily Strong: It wasn’t one of a kind, was it? Surely there are more.

[Everybody are staring at Cecily Strong]

Please, please.

[Cut to Kenan coming up front to camera]

Kenan Thompson: And that’s The Twilight Zone.

Leslie & Kyle | Season 44 Episode 21

Kyle Mooney

Leslie Jones

Paul Rudd

[Starts with Leslie watching something on her laptop and laughing in dressing room] [Cut to Kyle coming in dressing room]

Kyle Mooney: Oh, hey, Les, a change in the court sketch, you’re going to be the Bailiff now.

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: Oh, okay, cool, thanks Kyle. [Leslie gets back to watching] [Cut to Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: What are you watching?

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: I’m watching Russian car crashes, they’re crazy over there.

[Cut to Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: You know, last weekend I was watching those Leslie and Kyle videos we made for the show when we were in love with each other.

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: I remember those. Why did we stop making them?

[Cut to Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: They were great. Actually, can I show you a pretty fun clip.

[Kyle sits beside Leslie and takes over her laptop]

May I?

[Cut to the laptop playing a video where Kyle kisses Leslie] [Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: Oh, my god.

[Cut to the laptop playing a video where Leslie is making out with Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: Tell me I’m not dreaming.

[Cut to Kyle and Leslie]

Leslie Jones: Aw, we was babies.

Kyle Mooney: It was like last year. But you know it’s weird, sometimes people will come up to me on the street and say, “Are you really dating Leslie?”

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: No way! Me and you?

[Cut to Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: They truly thought it was real.

Leslie Jones: It’s ridiculous.

Kyle Mooney: Yeah, so ridiculous. Well, I should get out of here.

[Cut to Kyle and Leslie. Kyle passes the laptop back to Leslie.[

So enjoy your videos, madam.

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: Thank you, sir.

[Leslie leaves]

Umm, hey, Kyle.

[Kyle walks back in]

Kyle Mooney: What’s up?

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: Got some wine. You want to maybe have a glass of wine, we can watch videos.

[Cut to Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: Yeah, sure. I mean, I drink everyday, so—yes, let’s do it.

[Kyle walks and sits beside Leslie. Leslie passes Kyle a glass.]

Thanks. Well, to a wonderful year.

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: Oh, yes.

[Cut to Kyle and Leslie. They both take a sip of wine.]

Oh wait.

[Leslie wipes Kyle’s lips]

Oh, you got some on your lip.

Kyle Mooney: Thank you.

[Cut to Kyle]

Is this happening right now?

[Cut to Leslie]

Leslie Jones: I don’t know.

[Cut to Kyle and Leslie. They kiss.] [Cut to a dreamy world where Kyle and Leslie are walking together holding hands wearing matching dress.][Music is playing]

Kyle Mooney: Why do birds suddenly appear

every time you are near

just like me they long to be

lose to you

[Cut to a Kyle and Leslie having sex in dressing room]

Kyle Mooney: Oh god, crap!

[Cut to Paul Rudd walks in]

Paul Rudd: Whoa! What the [bleep] are you doing? This is my dressing room.

[Cut to Kyle and Leslie]

Kyle Mooney: Hey, sorry, man.

[Cut to Paul]

Paul Rudd: Oh, god. What’s that smell? Ew! It stinks over here too. Were you [bleep] over here too? It smells like a bad tooth. My shoes are stinking to the floor. It’s like an old movie theater.

[Cut to Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: Sorry okay?

[Cut to Paul] Oh, crap.

Paul Rudd: Are you still doing it? Get out of here.

[Cut to Kyle and Leslie. They both stand up.] [Cut to Paul. He looks away.]

Leslie Jones: We said sorry, dude. Are you stressed out?

[Cut to Leslie and Kyle]

Kyle Mooney: Hey man! We were just having sex for a few hours. [Cut to Paul] Relax.

Paul Rudd: Yea, I’m stressed out. I just—I want the finale to go well. I didn’t mean to yell. Sorry.

[Cut to Leslie and Kyle both start to massage Paul]

Leslie Jones: Aww baby.

Paul Rudd: That feels good. Mmm. Is this happening?

[They all start making out] [Cut to a dreamy world where Paul, Kyle and Leslie are dancing and holding hands wearing matching dress. Paul and Kyle starts kissing. Leslie is shocked.][Music is playing]