Jim Carrey
[Starts with SNL monologue intro]
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Jim Carrey.
[Jim Carry walks in and to the stage. He is wearing red funky clothes and he has horns on his head.]
[cheers and applause]
Jim Carrey: Thank you. Thank you. No, you might as well stop. It will never be enough. I am so excited to be here hosting the Halloween episode of Saturday Night Live.
[cheers and applause]
Yeah! Yes. I personally love Halloween. Everyone dresses up in crazy outfits and acts insane. It’s the one day of year that I actually blend in. For this Halloween, I’ve decided to be a bit of a hybrid. I call this ‘Helvis’. Now, we all know that Helvis went to heaven. That’s easy enough to prove. But while he was here, he did like to raise a little hell.
[people howling at the back]
He also really loved peanut butter and banana sandwiches. But eventually, he came to an important realization.
[Acting like Elvis Presley]
Man cannot live on fried peanut butter and sandwiches alone. I mean,what about dessert?
[music stars playing and Jim Carrey starts singing and dancing]
Well it’s late at night and I’m a hungry man
we’ve been howling with the beat of band
and I kind of emptied down in my soul
jelly in my belly starts to rock n’ roll
Is that a red finer diner by the side of the road
I got to order something out of the mode
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
Later at the house I’m gonna have some fun
turning up the TV with a loaded gun
Racked a bit karate and I get it right
working up my king size appetite
Is that a red thick thing to the store
I got to order what I have before,
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
When I say jump, all of my dude
I can use a power like a voodoo
before the show in Honolulu
I said to crew, when I’m through
I’ll have a pecan pie
[Four SNL cast members join Jim Carrey as back up singers and dancers]
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
I’ll have a pecan pie
Next day at 3 I’ma coming around
climbing off the charts but I’m feeling down
gonna be painting out a lot of loots
all the eating get to making me a bigger suit
smoking little dubbies hit around and talk
then my blood sugar’s dropping like a rock
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
[Other SNL cast members join Jim Carrey as back up singers and dancers]
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
[everybody on the stage are clapping while singing]
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pecan pie
I need a pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa papa wants a pecan pie
That song made me hungry. Hey red, [Bobby Moynihan appears infront of Helvis] You’re gonna sit here all day with that stupid look in your face while I starve to death? Or you’re gonna up your ass and get me a pecan pie.
[Jim Carrey sings again]
I don’t want a cherry
No more ordinary
[Bobby Moynihan gets him a pie on a plate]
Hallelujah
Finally got a pecan pie!
[Jim Carrey eats the pie and spits it out.]
That’s a lemon pie, man!
Bobby Moynihan: Got you! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. [Bobby Moynihan leaves]
[music starts again]
Jim Carrey: We’ll be right back. Iggy Azalea is here. Helvis has left the building.
[cheers and applause]