Doctor… Bowen Yang
Charlie… Pedro Pascal
Heidi: Doctor, I can’t believe this. How long has my husband been awake?
Bowen: Since this morning. And hey, call me Dr. Jim. He’s still very weak after the coma, but his mouth is moving and it seems like he wants to speak.
Kenan: Oh my god, I thought I lost my best friend. This is a miracle.
Sarah: I know. Look, he’s waking up.
Heidi: Charlie. Hey, it’s me. Welcome back.
Charlie: Oh my god. Where am I? Why am I in a bed? I don’t got anything that’s going on right now.
Doctor: It’s very common. He’s gonna be a little confused at first.
Charlie: Why is everybody-? Who is everybody? Why am I wearing paper?
Kenan: Did you say paper? Now that your hospital robe, buddy?
Heidi: Yeah, honey, you were in a little accident.
Charlie: Why are you calling me honey? Who are you?
Heidi: I’m your wife.
Charlie: Okay, not today.
Heidi: Did he say “Not today?” Honey, we’ve been married for eight years.
Charlie: Let’s just put a pin in that.
Doctor: He may not recognize you right now. But the important thing is, is that he’s up and talking.
Kenan: Yeah, but he’s talking with this like LA Mosh mouth thing. I mean, I’ve literally never heard that before.
Charlie: You think I sound LA? Thank you. I love LA.
Heidi: He has a totally different personality.
Doctor: This is completely normal and temporary. There’s even been instances of people coming out of comas and speaking foreign languages they could never before.
Charlie: Can I speak Spanish? Let me try. Saba, saba, sama, sama. Sounds like Spanish to me.
Kenan: No. It’s not Spanish. Is his brain okay?
Doctor: Let’s find out. Charlie, listen very carefully. You measure my life in two hours. And I serve you by expiring. I’m quick when I’m thin and slow when I’m fat. What am I?
Charlie: Duh, you’re a condo.
Doctor: He’s fine.
Heidi: That’s how you test for brain damage? [pulls out her phone] Okay honey, look at this video. This is what you normally sound like.
Charlie [in video]: Hey babe, made it to Arkansas. Pretty cool place. Miss you.
Charlie: Okay, he’s the hottest guy I’ve ever seen. Why does he live in Arkansas?
Sarah: No, Charlie, that’s you. You are on a business trip in Arkansas. That’s where you got hit by that Party City Truck.
Charlie: That’s not me. And who are you? Another wife?
Sarah: No, I’m not your wife. I’m your sister.
Charlie: Let’s put a pin in that.
Heidi: Why does he keep wanting to put a pin in things? Are you sure his brand is okay?
Doctor: Absolutely. Watch this. Charlie, Identify these objects. Okay?
Charlie: [ball card] Baa. [bird card] Bi. [boat card] Bo. [card with Bill Burr’s face] Bill Burr.
Doctor: He’s fine. Great job Charlie.
Charlie: Aw, thank you.
Heidi: Please, I want my old Charlie back. Look at him.
Charlie: No. I’m way skinnier than him.
Kenan: That’s because you lost 50 pounds in the coma.
Charlie: Oh, good for me.
Heidi: Doctor, I just don’t know if I can handle that.
Charlie: Oh my god. Don’t cry. You’re gonna make me cry. Come on, hold my hand. Look, I don’t know who you are. And despite what I said, I can’t speak Spanish. But the important thing is you’re my soulmate. And you and I, [in normal voice] you and I are going to be fine.
Doctor: See how he’s sounding clearer already?
Charlie: Because no matter what, people always gonna do that talk. And that’s the truth.
Doctor: Okay, he’s back sliding a little.
Heidi: What do I do?
Doctor: Meet him where he’s at.
Heidi: [speaking like him] Charlie, I’m your wife and I’ll never get tired.
Sarah: [speaking like him] Yes, and that goes same for me.
Kenan: [speaking like him] Now, I’m going to cry. And I like, never cry.
Charlie: Aww, you guys