Tag: Song

Office Song

Heidi Gardner

Melissa Villaseñor

Andrew Dismukes

Kyle Mooney

Jeremiah… Willem Dafoe

Punkie Johnson

Kenan Thompson

[Starts with a group of employees in their office]

Heidi: Okay, gang, these are all the files for the Innotech case. We’re looking for any transactions that point to funneling of funds into improper overseas accounts.

Melissa: These files go back six years. This is gonna take all night.

Andrew: I mean, if we’re lucky.

Kyle: Guys, I’m sorry. There’s nothing we can do. But I did ask our new temp, Jeremiah, to order pizza.

Jeremiah: Done and done boss. I hope 24 biggies are enough.

Punkie: It seems like plenty, Jeremiah. Yo. And I think it’s great that you’re reentering the workforce at your age.

Jeremiah: Well, thank you ma’am. Retirement wasn’t for me. So I thought what the heck? I don’t know. I’m excited.

Heidi: Okay, well, come on everybody. Grab a box and dig in. The clock’s ticking. We might as well get started.

Andrew: Great.

[Andrew starts to play a beat with his pencil on the desk]

Punkie: Okay. Okay. Wait.

[Punkie makes clicking sounds with the stapler] [Melissa makes tinging sound with the glass] [Jeremiah is looking around smiling. He’s enjoying.]

Heidi: [singing] Zappada-zappada-zow

Kyle: I like that.

Heidi: Zappada-zappada-zow

Kyle: Oh yeah!

Heidi: Zappada-zappada-zow

Kyle: Oh yeah!

Heidi: Zappada-zappada-zow

Andrew: Pumpada-pumpada-pow

Kyle: In the jungle, the mighty jungle
the lion sleeps tonight

Kyle and Melissa: In the jungle, the quiet jungle
the lion sleeps tonight

[Jeremiah getting too excited throws a chair out of the window breaking the glass.] do not eat in the jungle the quiet jungle

Heidi: Jerimiah!

Punkie: Why did you do that?

Jeremiah: I was trying to join in. I thought it would bounce off the window and make a cool sound.

Andrew: We’re 15 stories up, man. He’s gonna kill someone.

Heidi: What were you gonna do? Throw another chair every eight bar?

Jeremiah: Well, if it sounded cool, I would have.

[Kenan walks in]

Kenan: Ay, who threw a damn chair out this damn building?

Melissa: I’m sorry sir. Our temp had a little bit of a mishap.

Kenan: A mishap? Man, that chair just crushed my brand new Mercedes S class.

Jeremiah: We were signing an impromptu songs sir. Made it up on the spot. Then someone threw a chair. Do we remember who? Who did that?

Kenan: Man! You did a million dollars worth of damage.

Andrew: Sir, please. Look, I know this is bad. But it is his first day. Remember my first day? I was so nervous. I kept calling you daddy. You gave me a second chance.

Heidi: He’s got a point sir. What do you say?

Kenan: Hmm. I’m gonna regret this. But I’ll see you all here tomorrow.

[The next day]

Kenan: All right, let’s see it.

Andrew: Okay, Jeremiah. You can do this. Ready?

[They try to teach Jeremiah how to make sounds using office tools. But Jeremiah mistakenly throws the table top name plate at Heidi and she falls out of the window.]

All: Oh my god!

Kenan: No, no, it’s okay. It’s okay. She’s okay. She’s hanging on the ledge.

Jeremiah: I’ll throw another chair to help her climb out.

All: Jeremiah, no!

Kenan: Put the chair down.

Andrew: The worst temp ever!

Santa Song

Leslie D… Billie Eilish

Kate McKinnon

Ego Nwodim

Santa… Kenan Thompson

[starts with Leslie D, Kate and Ego at the stage. Leslie D is the lead singer]

Leslie D: Hey girls, I have a Christmas question for you: Has this ever happened to you?

Kate: It sure has Leslie D.

Leslie D: Wait, I haven’t asked you yet.

Ego: Asked us what Leslie D?

Leslie D: Just let me ask it and then you’ll know!

Kate: Okay don’t get mad…

Leslie D: Girls, I’m asking if you’ve ever dreamed of meeting someone your whole entire life, and then when you finally got the chance it didn’t go quite as planned?

Ego: Oh, we know just what you’re talking about.

Kate: But sing about it anyway just in case we don’t.

Leslie D: Okay…
[singing] It was a winter’s night, a quarter to three
I was dozin’ by my Christmas tree
When he appeared with a full white beard
The very guy that I revered
I’m talking Santa! (Santa)
I was in the same room as him

Ego: You met the Santa? Like, from the bible?

Kate: Where you nervous Leslie D?

Leslie D: Was I ever!

[singing] But I said to myself, “Don’t be a fool
Be smooth as ice and play it cool.”
So here is what I said…

“Hey sexy mama nice teeth!”

Yeah, I made it weird with Santa
(Santa)

Kate: Now why’d you go ahead and call him mama Leslie D?

Leslie D: I don’t know, I was nervous! He’s famous! And I thought if I winked he’d know I was kidding…um

[singing] Does Santa hate me?
It’s anyone’s guess
He said my name
And I said “yes”
He asked if I’d been naughty or nice
and I said: Why’s asking, virgin?
Yeah I made it weird with Santa!

Kate: What does that even mean Leslie D?

Leslie D: I don’t know, it just came out of my mouth! Haha…

Ego: Well, what did Santa do?

Leslie D: He gave an odd smile and said, “Okay sure”
Then he sorta started heading towards the door…

Ego: Not the chimney?

Leslie D: No I think he just wanted to get out of there. 

So I said, “Okay Santa, you do you!”
And then I made finger guns and I went “zoop zoop”

Leslie D: Yikes, what is wrong with you?

Ego: Don’t feel bad, it happens to us all

Kate: We met him once at a Christmas ball

Kate and Ego: How could we converse with him? We should’ve rehearsed
Cause then he asked us if we were good and here’s what we said…

Ego: You tell me, you’re in charge Daddy…

Leslie D: Woah!

Ego: I thought I was flirting, I don’t know, but then I remembered, maybe he has a wife?

Kate: So then, I said, “Hey Santa, so you and Mrs. Clause never had children. Was that a conscious decision or was there like a health issue there? Or are the elves your children and you keep trying to make a tall one?”

Leslie D: Oh no. Then what happened?

Kate: He asked me what my name was and I said Beth. And he said, “Get away from me Beth.”
I don’t think I’m on good terms with Santa
Santa

Ego: But it gets worse, ’cause then I said, “Sorry Santa, we’ll leave you alone. But just so you know, you’re zipper is down.” And he said, “No, no, that’s just the fuzzy seame on my Santa suit. And I said, “No look!” And then I touched him down there.

Kate: Why?!

Ego: I don’t know! Because my brain doesn’t work!

Kate and Ego: We really blew it with Santa

Santa

Leslie D: He thinks I’m a dodo
He thinks I’m a doof
My, oh my, what’s that sound on the roof?

[Santa walks in with a mic]

Santa: Ho ho ho!

All: Santa!

Santa: Prancer said that I should give you one more chance. After all, it is Christmas.

Kate: It’s not our fault Santa

Ego: We’re not good in crowds

Leslie D: We never know what we’ll say out loud

Santa: All is forgiven, in fact I bring gifts
As a thank you for this jazzy Christmas Riff!

Ego: Wow!

Santa: What do you say?

Kate: My wife.

Santa: Try again.

Leslie D: Thank you Santa. We’re weird, but we love you!

Santa: Hey, Santa’s a little weird too, hehe.

All: Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas!

Funeral Song

Miriam Lewis… Heidi Gardner

Father… Owen Wilson

Cecily Strong

Andrew Dismukes

Aidy Bryant

Chloe Fineman

Levar B. Burton… Kenan Thompson

[Starts with a picture of Miriam Lewis on screen.] [Cut to Father at the podium in funeral.]

Father: Welcome. We are here today to honor the passing of Miriam Lewis. Miriam was a devoted mother, a loving grandmother, a devout church goer and most of all, just a free spirit.

Cecily: She sure was.

Andrew: Nana live a life.

Father: And Miriam’s favorite thing to do in the whole world was to take the bus down to Atlantic city and play those penny slots.

Aidy: Yes. She went every single weekend.

Chloe: [sobbing] I miss Nana so much.

Father: Mariam wanted every detail of this funeral to reflect her spirit, starting with her all time favorite song as sung by her all time favorite performer, please welcome bussed in, not direct, from the Loose Nugget Casino, legendary Atlantic city headliner, Levar B. Burton.

[Levar B. Burton walks in]

Levar B. Burton: Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you to Peter Pan bus lines for bringing me to New York city via Secaucus via Hershey, Pennsylvania. I knew Miriam very well. She would always sit front row in my show and shout, “Sing my song!” Well, this one’s for you, Miriam.

[music playing] [singing] I used to think that I could not go on

Aidy: This song sounds familiar.

Levar B. Burton: And life was nothing but an awful song.

[A slideshow of Miriam Lewis’s pictures is on the TV screen]

Cecily: I think it’s ‘I believe I can fly’.

Levar B. Burton: If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, 

We miss you, Mimi.

there’s nothing to it

Say it with me.

I believe I can fly.

Cecily: Stop. This song is by R. Kelly.

Aidy: Yea. We were already sad and then you made us listen to R. Kelly.

Levar B. Burton: Well, actually, you’re listening to Levar B. Burton.

Father: Hold on. I don’t understand. Miriam told me she wanted this specific song.

Andrew: But R. Kelly is a horrible man who did awful things.

Chloe: Well, maybe Nana didn’t know about all that.

Cecily: Hah, maybe she didn’t.

Aidy: Yea, and it was Nana’s wish.

Cecily: Yea, I guess go ahead, Lavar Burton.

Levar B. Burton: Ah! Lavar B. Burton. Yes, that’s very important legally. Now, where was I?

[singing] I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky

[There’s a picture of Miriam Lewis and Levar B. Burton on screen]

Hey, that’s us.

Thinking about it every night and day

[There’s a picture of Miriam Lewis and Louis C.K. on screen]

Oh, no.

Spread my wings and fly away.

[There’s a picture of Miriam Lewis and Donald Trump on screen]

Andrew: Wow, she sure met a lot of celebrities.

[There’s a picture of Miriam Lewis and Kevin Spacey on screen]

Levar B. Burton: I believe I can fly

[There’s a picture of Miriam Lewis and Bill Cosby on screen]

That’s way too recent

[Cecily walks up to the stage and stops Levar B. Burton]

Cecily: I’m sorry. Thank you very much for coming, Lavar Burton.

Levar B. Burton: Oh, don’t forget that B in the middle.

Cecily: This may be what Nana wanted but this is not how we wanted to remember her.

Father: Look folks, I don’t know a lot about celebrities or rock n’ roll, and I’m sure Nana didn’t either. But she was just a sweet old lady who loved to see a show and I know she wanted a funeral that reflected that. Because I’ll never forget, right before she died, she looked at me straight in the eyes and said, “I believe I can fly.” And then she jumped.

Aidy: Yea, those gambling debts finally caught up to her.

Cecily: Oh, so that’s why she chose this song.

Levar B. Burton: So, you want me to finish it?

Cecily: No. Absolutely not. Why don’t you play Nana’s second favorite song instead?

Levar B. Burton: Oh, you got it.

[Music for the song ‘Ignition’ by R. Kelly starts playing]

Now, usually I don’t do this but why don’t we go on and break them up with a little piece of the remix?

[singing] It’s a remix to ignition, babe
patting fresh out the kitchen

[starts singing gibberish]

Pride Month Song

Terence… Bowen Yang

Anya Taylor-Joy

Kate McKinnon

Punkie Johnson

[Music video starts with artists intro]

Terence: Hey, all you shes, gays, and nays. It’s the month of almost June

Kate: And you know what that means!

Punkie: Pride is around the corner!

Anya: But last year, Pride didn’t happen, so now, we’re making up for lost time

Terence: [singing] Pride is a celebration, yeah, that’s what it’s about
Last year, we couldn’t meet up, but this time it’s allowed

Anya: With my queer friends and allies, now it’s time to go out

All: Ooh, ooh, we get to do it all again

Terence: Now we’re out on the floor, but I don’t see my crush
He’s not texting me back, well, I’ll just brush it off
I have a mental breakdown, make my friends take care of me
And I think wooo! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Chorus: It’s Pride again!
We’ve been waiting so long
It’s Pride again!
For so much to go wrong
It’s Pride again!
Santa comes, but for queers
This is our Saint Paddy’s Day
Acting sloppy ’cause we’re gay

[Anya is talking to Terence cheering him up]

Anya: Who cares about him? You’re so cool and so funny!

Terence: I don’t wanna be funny! I wanna be hot!

Kate: It’s our first Pride together

Anya: And it’s also our last

Kate: ‘Cause even for lesbians

Anya: We moved in way too fast

Kate: But we’re still hosting a gay brunch

Anya: And frying eggs got us hot

Anya and Kate: Ooh, ooh, tonight we’ll break up again

Terence: You go flirt with that girl?

Punkie: Man, I tried, but she’s straight

Terence: Well then, how ’bout her friend?

Punkie: She is also a straight

Terence and Punkie: When did all these straight girls
Start dressing lesbian?
And we go woooo! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Chorus: It’s Pride again!
It’s inclusive and it’s great!
It’s Pride again!
But who let in all these straights?
It’s Pride again!
Gender is just clothes
Let’s go eat some Chick Fil-A
Nothing matters anyway

[Kate speaking to Terence]

Kate: Wait, we’re not eating Chick Fil-A. They’re homophobic!

Terence: Okay, no. That is such a neoliberal notion to equate individual responsibility with collectivist politics.

Kate: Terence, don’t talk like you read theory. You don’t read theory.

Terence: I read theory, sis. Sis, I read theory!

Anya: What theory do you read?

Terence: Podcasts?

Anya: Terence, that is not theory!

Terence: Well, you work at Georgia Bank! You Georgia Bank bitch!

Punkie: Oh God, I miss this

[Lil Nas X appears wearing similar clothes]

Lil Nas X: Time for the parade, y’all. Let’s get messy!
You’d hate the drama on any other night
But during Gay Pride, this is doing gay right
Post hole on close friends, post hole on main
Post hole for the countries where you can’t be gay
Marsha P. Johnson and Harvey Milk
They paved the way for you to shake your filth
Stonewall was a kiki when they threw the brick
They fought for your right to be this chaotic

Chorus: Yeah, yeah, yeah! It’s Pride again!
We’re so sunburnt and mad
And we love it!
Fifty-dollar drinks that are bad
How we missed it!
I’m overwhelmed, but I love
We’re just happy that we’re queer
And can do this every year

[Outro]

Terence: Wait, are we on a Deutsche Bank float?

All:This sucks
It’s Pride again!

Weekend Update- Vin Diesel Releases Song

Colin Jost

Michael Che

[Starts with Colin Jost in his news set. There’s a picture of Mitch McConnell at left top corner.]

 Colin Jost: Mitch McConnell seen here calmly watching an injured puppy try to cross a busy highway, said that the senate would move forward with a vote on Trump’s supreme court nominee even though he denied Obama’s nominee a vote in Michael Che0Colin Jost6. And if that makes you angry at Mitch McConnell, you’re going to be really upset when you find out your anger sexually excites him.

[Cut to Michael Che. There’s a picture of Tennessee Titans logo at right top corner.]

 Michael Che: That’s gross. The Tennessee Titans halted in person wokouts after three players tested positive for the coronavirus. Well, I guess we’ve got to cancel the whole season and forget it ever happened, said the New York Jets.

[Cut to Colin Jost. There’s a picture of an article that says ‘woman arrested for importing bull semen’ at left top corner.]

 Colin Jost: This is fun. A Canadian was fined more than $Michael Che5,000 for illegally importing bull semen. Meanwhile, in the US, bull semen is sold legally under the name ‘White Claw’. [Picture changes to three cans of White Claw soda.] [Picture changes to a news article that says ‘New law making boards of directors more diverse’.]

A new law has been passed in California requiring companies to have more diversity in their board of directors, which is how I forced my way on to the board of BET. “BET, there’s gonna be some changes around here.”

[Cut to Michael Che. There’s a picture of a lizard at right top corner.]

 Michael Che: The CDC reported that there’s a salmonella outbreak involving people who had pet bearded dragons. So, if you have one at home, remember to cook them all the way through.

[Picture changes to Vin Diesel]

Actor Vin Diesel has released a dance music song called “Feel like I do.” And look, I know a lot of people are making fun of him and saying it’s terrible and he should stick to acting…

[Michael Che looks away] [Cut to Colin Jost. He is waiting for Michael Che to finish. There’s a picture of Pogo stick at left top corner.]

 Colin Jost: A seven year old boy in Pennsylvania set a new world record by bouncing on a pogo stick over Michael Che,000 times in a row. Said the boys parents, “Open the schools!”

Digital Exclusive- Lockdown Song

Chris Redd

Ego Nwodim

Kenan Thompson

[Starts with rappers rapping from in their homes.] [music playing]

Chris: Wild Trio Gang. You know we back in this thang, turn the club up every night.

Ego: But we quarantined, and the club closed now.

Chris: Cause of corona’s ol’ goofy ass. So, I guess we just gonna have to turn up here at the crib then. The whole city locked down, you feel me? Ay!

I’m lit, sippin’ what’s left in my fridge
is it good? I don’t know
clean my kitchen and mess it back up
get dressed and sit in my room
remember high fives, handshakes? all that gone
I salute or nod, don’t touch me!
All I do is nap to gain weight
time to look you can’t push up away
living room pilates mask and gloves when I’m shoppin’
keep it 6 feet in line, don’t cough, I don’t want your droplets
house party while I flex my chain
Instagram live, look, it’s my chain
hey, sneezing in public just won’t be the same
sneezing in public just won’t be the same

Chorus: Lil’ Rona got the city on lockdown
maybe we can, nope, city on lockdown
can’t go out, city on lockdown
on your Zoom, city on lockdown
essentials only, city on lockdown
put the mask on when you go out
get what you need, then take your ass home
Lil’ Rona got the city on lockdown

Ego Nwodim: Club my crib, Lil’ Rona outside
that’s a bitch I don’t like (who’s that?)
She said my name at the door (who?)
I said, “I don’t know that ho”
I gotta keep her off me
anyway, I got a table coffee
pop a bottle of champagne, vodka
tequila keep me saucy
olive oil, V8, prune juice
I sit on my couch and I wile
the hell out in my socks, I call ’em new shoes
all socks, so free, black socks, white socks,
red socks, baseball oop,
I love my vibe, I’m the DJ too
After party, I’m tore up
yeah, don’t got to go far
coz my bed right there, yeah, yeah

Chorus: Lil’ Rona got the city on lockdown
maybe we can, nope, city on lockdown
is this for real? City on lockdown
I’m losing my mind, city on lockdown
Kenan: it’s Big Cash, y’all know me
huh? Gotta keep it down, baby asleep
I got babies and they asleep
those my babies, like the baby
I go baby on baby on baby on baby
that’s two babies, my lady and me
shh, oh, look at that baby asleep
yeah, she’s so cute, yeah

Chorus: Lil’ Rona got the city on lockdown
shh, lost my clothes, city on lockdown
lost my phone, city on lockdown
time don’t exist, city on lockdown
we love New York city, city, city
city on lockdown, hey

Kenan: Shh, the baby asleep

Finest Girl (Bin Laden Song)

[Andy Samberg Music video starts]

Andy Samberg: [singing] Finest girl I ever met in my whole life
Wanted to take her home, make her my wife
Knew she was a freak when she started talking

She said, “fuck me like we fucked Bin Laden”

That girl was freak
She said she wanted me to fuck her harder then the military

Fucked Bin Laden

Fuck Bin Laden
Fuck Bin Laden

She wanted to fuck me harder then the US government
Fucked Bin Laden

[rapping] She was a freaky kind of girl
Kept up with current events from all around the world
More specifically one event
The time Osama Bin Laden got shot in the head
She said “do me like that”
But I couldn’t track the metaphor
That said I can see you horny like a Stegosaur
That said again your request is so irregular
She put on a beard, I started looking at the exit door
Then a turban
Then a tunic
She said “invade my cave with your special unit”
I said “he wasn’t in a cave”, but there was no stopping
She demanded that I fuck her like we

[singing] Fucked Bin Laden
Fuck Bin Laden
Fuck Bin Laden

She wanted to fuck me harder then the US government
Fucked Bin Laden

This girl requested intercourse to bring her to climax
With the clinical efficiency of the assassination of Bin Laden

[rapping] You’re harboring a fugitive (that ass)
My justice will be punitive (I’ma smash)
Night-vision, they can see us through my go-pro
She tried to negotiate, I said that’s a no-no
Now I’m creeping in her bed room like go-go
She tells me to go low then looks down and tells me that I gotta
“Terrorize that pussy”
“Gotta terrorize that pussy”
So I did it, improvise some crazy shit
Seal Team sixty-nine sexecuting the hit
She said “now you’ve finished me off, throw my body in the ocean”
I yell “geronimo!” and took some pictures for posting
The President called, he said “congratulations Connor”
I said “Mr. President, to what do I owe this honor?”
He said “come give me the deets in the White House garden
I gots to know how you fucked her like we

[singing] Fucked Bin Laden”
Fuck Bin Laden
Fuck Bin Laden

I still can’t say that I see the appeal, but she wanted me to fuck her like we fucked Bin Laden

Oh, this girl insisted that that the way we did it was merciless and exact sanity attack
Just like the now-famous attack that fucked
Osama Bin Laden

[Andy Sambers wakes up on a couch]

Damn, the whole thing was a virtual reality experience.

Nicki Minaj’s Booty

Jeremy… Pete Davidson

Brain… James Franco

Mrs. Menzeneli… Cecily Strong

Song, Billy Zane… Taran Killam

Rhombus… Aidy Bryant

Dance… Kyle Mooney

Fresh Prince… Jay Pharoah

Nicki Minaj

Judge Lance Ito… Bobby Moynihan

Ashley Parker Angel… Beck Bennett

Home Alone… Kate McKinnon

Jurassic Park… Venessa Bayer

[Starts with Jeremy on laptop]

Jeremy: Ah! What? I have to create a new password? I don’t want to do that. There’s no way I’m gonna be able to remember another new password! My brain is too full. My brain is too full. My brain is too full.

[Cut to Brain’s brain]

Brain: Alright. Alright, alright! All the information and memories in Jeremy’s brain, gather around. We need to make more room in here for some new stuff which means it time for a lot of you non-essentials to go. First up is, Jeremy second grade teacher Mrs. Menzeneli here.

[Mrs. Menzeneli walks in]

Mrs. Menzeneli: Yes, can I help you young man?

Brain: Ah! Yeah, I’m sorry Mrs. Menzeneli, but Jeremy does not need to remember your name anymore.

Mrs. Menzeneli: What? But I’ve been here for 20 years.

Brain: Only because one time you fell down hard in class that really affected him. But now it’s time to move on out. Okay? Bye-bye, Mrs. Menzeneli. Thanks.

[Mrs. Menzeneli walks away and falls down]

Brain: Okay. Next up, are all the words to Savage garden’s I want you still in here?

[Song slides in]

Song: You tell me. [starts singing the song ‘I want you’.]

Brain: Alright, a simple yes would have suffice. Time for you to go.

Song: But, [Song starts singing again]

Brain: Wrong! Wrong! You need to chicken cherry check yourself out of this brain.

Song: Huh! He used my lyrics against me!

[Song leaves] [Rhombus walks in]

Rhombus: Um, excuse me brain dude. I would like to volunteer to leave.

Brain: And who are you?

Rhombus: Oh, I’m the word ‘Rhombus’. I have been here since 99, okay? Jeremy doesn’t know what I am or what I look like. He just knows the word. So, I’m gonna get the hell out of here and I’m gonna take the ‘Bye, bye, bye’ dance with me.

[Dance walks in and starts dancing] [‘Bye, bye, bye’ by Nsync is playing]

Brain: Okay, bye, bye, bye. Okay.

[Rhombus and Dance are leaving]

What else can we lose?

[Fresh Prince walks in]

Fresh Prince: [rapping and dancing] What’s Philadelphia born and raised 

On a playground where I spent most of my days

Brain: Oh, yeah! Gotta leave! Go!

Fresh Prince: Oh, man! Come one! Jeremy uses me all the time. I kill the Karaoke. Yeah! Anyway, whatever host, smell you later.

[Fresh Prince leaves]

Brain: Okay, next up we have–

[Nicki Minaj walks in and starts rapping]

Nicki Minaj: Boy toy named Troy used to live in Detroit
Big dope dealer money, he was gettin’ some coins

Brain: You’re only gonna sing the first two lines?

Nicki Minaj: That’s all Jeremy knows.

Brain: Well, Nicki, I know you’re new here, but you gotta go.

Nicki Minaj: Hey, I mean, I don’t– don’t get mad at me. I don’t know why our boy watched the music video so many times.

[Nicki Minaj turns around and walks away]

Brain: Okay, out in the way back?

[Judge Lance Ito walks in]

Judge Lance Ito: Okay, it’s me, Judge Lance Ito.

Brain: From the OJ Simpson trial?

Judge Lance Ito: Yes, yes.

Brain: Okay, Judge Ito, you gotta pack it up and take that dog from that 90s production company with you.

[Cut to a black dog with a frisbee]

Voice: Sit, booboo, sit. Good dog.

[Cut to Brain. Ashley Parker Angel walks in.]

Brain: Okay.

Ashley Parker Angel: What about me? Should I go too?

Brain: Ashley Parker Angel from O-Town? God, this kid remembers the weirdest things. Yes, Ashley Parker Angel from O-Town, you gotta go too.

Ashley Parker Angel: That seems fair.

[singing] Coz all I want is you or nothing at all

Brain: Alright, alright, alright.

[Ashley Parker Angel leaves]

Let’s clear out some old movie quotes. That should open up a ton of space. Home Alone, you first. Out.

[Home Alone walks in]

Home Alone: I brought you girlfriend, wow!

[Home Alone walks out]

Brain: Jurassic Park, you too.

[Jurassic Park walks in]

Jurassic Park: He left us! He left us!

[Jurassic Park leaves]

Brain: Finally, Titanic. Hit the road.

[Billy Zane walks in]

Billy Zane: I always win Jack, one way or another.

Brain: Who remembers a Billy Zane line from Titanic? What a freak!

[Billy Zane leaves]

Alright, I think that’s everything. Jeremy should finally have room in here for that new password.

[Nicki Minaj walks in and starts rapping]

Nicki Minaj: [rapping] Boy toy named Troy used to live in Detroit
Brain: I thought I told you to leave, Nicki.

Nicki Minaj: I’m really stuck in here.

[Brain and Nicki Minaj start dancing to the song] [rapping] Boy toy named Troy used to live in Detroit
Big dope dealer money, he was gettin’ some coins

[Cut to Jeremy dancing while watching Nicki Minaj on his laptop.]