Month: October 2018

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Seth Meyers


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NBC Special ReportSummary: Osama bin Laden (Seth Meyers) delivers a videotaped message about the U.S. Election and Ashlee Simpson’s appearance on last week’s episode of “Saturday Night Live.”

Recurring Characters: Tom Brokaw, Osama bin Laden.

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You Call This A House, Do Ya?Summary: “Buildin'” Finn McQuinn (Seth Meyers) and the home repair crew give an Irish home makeover.

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Coolest Teacher At Benton Township High SchoolSummary: Mr. J (Seth Meyers) is the coolest teacher in school, but faces strong competition in his new rival, the laid-back Phil (Luke Wilson).

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Hubbard SystemsSummary: The head (Seth Meyers) of the Hubbard Systems retreat seminar comments on the IT technicians who played pranks on the corporate board members who drank too much during the Hawaiian party the night before.

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Sarah Silverman

1993-1994

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Rob Schneider

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1993-1994

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Rob Riggle : Cast Member

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2004-2005

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Bio: Rob Riggle (1970-). A member of the Upright Citizens Brigade comedy troupe; served his country in Liberia, Kosovo, and Afghanistan as a Marine Corps officer; “Daily Show” correspondent. Notable Sketches

Weekend Update with Tina Fey and Amy Poehler

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Robin Duke

04/11/81

1981-1982

1982-1983

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Rich Hall

1984-1985

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Robert Downey, Jr.

1985-1986

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Robert Downey Jr.’s Monologue

Downey, Jr. shows slides from his summer vacation.

Mr. Music

D.J. (Downey, Jr.) plays inappropriate music at wedding reception.

The Streets of L.A.

Detective’s (Downey, Jr.) banter seems appropriate for Downey, Jr.

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Rob Smigel

1992-1993

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Randy Quaid

1985-1986

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Rachel Dratch


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Operator DateSummary: Shy Gary (Jon Heder) is set up on a blind date with Julie (Rachel Dratch), who not only records voice greetings for various companies, but speaks in the same monotone when out in public.

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I Love PieSummary: During lunch at the office cafeteria, Lisa (Rachel Dratch) checks to see what’s available for dessert, then sarcastically leads her co-workers in a song of celebration for the many goodies that might await them.

Note: This sketch aired in place of “Butt Pregnancy” when the episode reran on 07/22/06.

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Fairmont Suites InnSummary: A traveler (Peter Sarsgaard) suffers through the hotel’s televised ad (Rachel Dratch) when he can’t find the remote control in his room.

Note: Gaffes abound throughout the sketch when the TV picture disappears after Peter Sarsgaard hits it, Peter Sarsgaard and Rachel Dratch laugh consistently, and a stagehand’s head can be seen depositing the remote control into the scene.

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SNL Transcripts