Cleaner… Beck Bennett[starts with Kenan briefing the voice actors about the project
Kenan: Alright, as you know we just completed the initial story board for TV movie Zoo-Opolis. It’s an animated film about a city that’ s full of animals.
Octavia: Is that like, Zootopia?
Kenan: Is that like, Zootopia? Who are you? My lawyer? Now, we need a scratch track for placeholders for all the voices so the animators have something to work with. Alright, first up, we’ve got the opening line of the film from Honey Bunny, voiced by Jennifer Lopez.
Melissa: I could try J-Lo’s lines.
Kenan: Okay, great. You can just read from the prompter. Whenever you’re ready.[Melissa walks to the mic]
Melissa: [Speaking like Jennifer Lopez] You know, everyone says a rabbit can never be a lawyer, but they’re forgetting about Hopeas Corups, because I put the butt in rab-but, Zoo-Opolis. Yeah.
Kenan: Okay. Next up, we’ve got Bartleby. He’s a bumblebee voiced by Hugh Grant.
Alex: Um, I could take a crack of that.
Kenan: Alright, go for it.[Alex walks to the mic]
Alex: [speaking like Hugh Grant] I um.. I would have brought flowers but um, you see, I’m too small. I’m terribly sorry. I must admit I’m a little buzzed. Zoo-Opolis.
Kenan: Not bad. Alright. Well, we also have F’Heather the pigeon, voiced by Oprah Winfrey.
Octavia: Oh, I got this one. [Octavia walks to the mic] [talking like Oprah Winfrey] I love bread crumbs. I love bread crumbs and that’s a joy of wing-watchers. I still eat bread crumbs every day, and I have lost over two ounces. I love bread crumbs. Zoo-Opolis.
Kenan: Perfect. That was perfect. Thank you very much. Alright, next up, we have Dane Daniel. And that’s a great dane voiced by Tracy Morgan. I can probably just throw that down real quick myself. [holds a mic] [clears his throat] [speaking like Tracy Morgan] I’ma put my peepee in a chihuahua and make it explode. Yeah, I think we got that. We got that pretty good. Um, we also have Sqwecily the squirrel voiced by Kristen Wiif.
Melissa: I can try that. [speaking like Kristen Wiig] I just got kicked out of my tree. Ha-ha. They told me I had to leave. I’m staying with my best friend, he is an acorn. Ha-ha. Sorry, I know I seem a little nuts right now, I just opened a can of nuts and a snake jumped out. Ha-ha. Then I looked at the lael and it said, ‘Can of snakes.’ Ha-ha. Zoo-Opolis.
Kenan: Thank you. We also have a kangaroo voiced by Viola Davis whose name is Viola G’Day-Vis.
Octavia: I got this one. [speaking like Viola Davis] I am not just a kangaroo. I am Viola Davis as a kangaroo. And I will exhume the body from my pouch, Denzel.
Kenan: Such a powerful speech. Thank you. Alright, we just have a few quick lines left. Who ever wants to just jump in and go for it. Kathy Griffin as penguin.
Melissa: [speaking like Kathy Griffin] Okay, here is the deal. I just hang out of my igloo. I invited few polar bears over. Yes, they’re gay.
Kenan: Alright. An old beaver named Dame Judi Dentures.
Octavia: Sixty years of acting and this is the first time I’m showing my Beaver.
Kenan: Oh, boy! Next, NBA commentator Bill Walton as moose
Alex: [speaking like Bill Walton] Oh my god! I love the bulls and I love the bucks. Gosh, they have a promising future. Slam dunk. Zoo-Opolis.
Kenan: Right. Um, Jodie Foster as a hummingbird.
Octavia: [speaking like Jodie Foster] We meet again, doctor nectar. I’m agent starling like the bird.
Kenan: And then we have Julia Louis Dreyfus as a bat.
Melissa: [speaking like Julia Louis Dreyfus] You know, I’m a bat. So, yeah.
Kenan: No, I”m sorry I misread that. The bat is actually Owen Wilson.
Melissa: [speaking like Owen Wilson] Oh, well, well, yeah. I’m a bat, yeah.
Kenan: No, no. Sorry, I really misread it. The bat is Kate McKinnon.
Melissa: [speaking like Kate McKinnon] Hey, hey, I”m a bat. Okay? Yeah.
Kenan: Okay. And, finally, the last line of the movie is Javier Bardem as wise old owl. [voice actors are looking at each other] Nobody? Nobody has a Javier Bardem?[Cleaner walks in]
Cleaner: Hey, um, I can give it a try. Alright, here we go. [speaking like Javier Bardem] Every animal must have sex, hmm? Money has sex wit ha turtle. You know? A gopher has sex with a parrot. And the best part is that they never have to wear a condom. Alright!
Kenan: Alright, well, that was extremely off script. Do you even work here?
Cleaner: Um, no.