Behind The Music: Rock And Roll Heaven


Behind The Music: Rock And Roll Heaven

Jim Morrison…..Val Kilmer
Jesus…..Will Ferrell
Fan #1…..Chris Kattan
Fan #2…..Rachel Dratch
Jimi Hendrix…..Jimmy Minor
Janis Joplin…..Molly Shannon
Buddy Holly…..Jimmy Fallon
Louis Armostrong…..Tracy Morgan
Keith Moon…..Horatio Sanz
Amelia Earhart…..Ana Gasteyer

Announcer: There’s an old saying in music, and it goes like this: “If there’s a rock and roll heaven, you know they’ve gotta have a hell of a band.” Well, tonight, we’ll explore this phenomenon, as we go up through the clouds, onto the stages, and behind the music of Rock and Roll Heaven.

Heaven. And every day, thousands of young hopefuls arrive by bus accidents, or other means, all vying for one thing – to make it big. But for the recently dead Jim Morrison, Heaven was proving to be anything but.

Jim Morrison: When I first got here, I was, like, “Whoa, it’s like ‘Candid Camera’, man. I thought for sure I was going to Hell – one of God’s little tricks. Anyway, I was thinking about some sort of revenge, so I decided to start a supergroup.

Narrator: And Morrison chose his super group wisely. On leads guitar, Jimi Hendrix; harmony vocals, Janis Joplin; on drums, the legendary Keith Moon; Morrison recruited the great Buddy Holly on rhythm guitar; and, finally, a Wild Card – Louis Armstrong on trumpet. They were to be the greatest band of all time, and they called themselves The Great Frog Society.

[ show “Exclusive Rehearsal Footage” of The Great Frog Society ]Jim Morrison: [ singing ]“And now, I’ve broke on through
Well, I’ve still got a question for you:
Now we’re on the other side
What do we do, now that we’ve died?
Not this side, the other side
Not this side, the adjacent side

[ Louis Armstrong steps forward for his trumpet solo ]

Narrator: Luckily for the band, in the audience, at one of their earlier performances, was record producer, and Son of God, Jesus.

Jesus: When I first heard The Great Frog Society, I was, like, “Oh.. my.. Dad!” I signed them immediately!

Narrator: Their first release, “Mourn The Great Frog Society”, was an immediate success. And, from the start, the band was the talk of Heaven.

Fan #1: The Great Frog Society is the best band ever!

Fan #2: Oh, my God! They’re the best! The best ever!

Narrator: But offstage things were falling apart..

Announcer: [ over SUPER ] “But offstage things were falling apart,” is a registered trademark of VH1 and “Behind the Music.”

[ show beginning downfall of the band ]

Narrator: The immense success of the band led to in-fighting, and a clash of egos.

Jimi Hendrix: I gotta tell you, man.. your vibes are really bumming me out.

Jim Morrison: No, man. I’m The Great Frog Society guy, man. I can do anything.

Jimi Hendrix: Now, see? That’s what I’m talking about, man!

Janis Joplin: Man, we’re here for the music, you know?

Buddy Holly: Well, I’ll tell you this much.. if this doesn’t get any better, than I qui-i-i-it!

Louis Armstrong: Hey, everybody? Why all the fussing and fighting? Every time I get mad, I just sing a song! Wop-bop-a-lu-bop..!

Keith Moon: [ bangs drums ] That’s it! I quit! [ runs out of studio ]

Narrator: Adding to the mounting pressure was the band’s increasing frustration with Morrison’s new girlfriend, famed aviatrix, Amelia Earheart.

Jim Morrison: Hey, guys. This is my gal, Amelia. Sing your song – she wrote it, it’s great. Listen.

[ other band members groan ]

Amelia Earhart: [ singing ]“Hey, Guy, don’t you know you have my heart?
Lucky guy, you’re my forever guy
Okay guy!”

Louis Armstrong: That’s awful.

Janis Joplin: I’m outta here.

Louis Armstrong: That’s awful!

[ they all leave in disgust ]

Narrator: But the worst news was yet to come, when, on January 28th, 1982, Jim Morrison received a phone call informing him that his bandmate and longtime friend Buddy Holly had been reincarnated as a sheep.

Jim Morrison: When we lost Buddy, man, I just.. is it recording? No music, man.. No Doors.. [ close-up ] I think I’m having a nervous breakdown..

Narrator: Dubbed “The Day The Music Was Reincarnated”, it proved to be a death knell for the band. It was the end of The Great Frog Society. And, for the next few years, the band members went their separate ways. Jim Morrison was reincarnated as this little girl; Jimi Hendrix became a businessman; Janis Joplin came back as a sumo wrestler; and Louis Armstrong became a tree stump. But The Great Frog Society are nothing, if not survivors. And we end tonight’s “Behind The Music” with exclusive footage of the surviving members’ reunion, as they perform The Doors’ classic “The End”. For The Great Frog Society, it’s most definitely the beginning.

[ as credits roll, show Little Girl and other reincarnated band members singing “The End” ]

Little Girl: “This is the end, my only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Father, yes son, I want to kill you
Mother.. I want to.. auggghhhh!!!

[ fade to black ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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