Mother… Kate McKinnon
Michael… Pete Davidson
Martin Luther King… Kenan Thompson
[Starts with a mother checking on to her son.]
Mother: Michael, are you still up? It’s nearly midnight.
[Michael is using his laptop.]
[cheers and applause]
Michael, you haven’t finished your paper yet?
Michael: I’m sorry mom, I just don’t know what to write about Martin Luther King.
Mother: Well, focus up pal. It’s due tomorrow.
[Michael closes his laptop]
Michael: Man! I just need a little help.
Male voice: Michael! Michael!
[Michael looking around to see who is calling him.]
[Martin Luther King appears in front of him]
Michael: Wow, Martin Luther King?
Martin Luther King: Yeah!
Michael: I must be dreaming.
Martin Luther King: Hey, nothing wrong with dreaming. I heard you needed some help.
Michael: Yeah, I’m supposed to write a paper about your legacy but I don’t know what to say.
Martin Luther King: Oh, well, what do you know about me so far?
[Martin Luther King takes a seat beside Michael]
Michael: Well, you’re black, you’re a great leader and today you own a bunch of boulevards.
Martin Luther King: Uh-huh! Like in nice neighborhoods with gardens?
Michael: No. Kind of like where the Wu Tang Clan is from.
Martin Luther King: Okay. I guess we’re still climbing that mountain.
Michael: Oh, and on Monday, there’s this national holiday called Martin Luther King day.
Martin Luther King: Oh, wonderful. Is that a day when black and white Americans come together and reflect on the progress we’ve made?
Michael: Not really. It’s more like a day where my mom calls up work and says, “Do I have to come in today?” And they’re like, “Well, the offices are open but you don’t have to come in.” And my mom’s like, “Great! I won’t come in then.”
Martin Luther King: Uh-huh. Still climbing.
Michael: But the country made a lot of progress. We got a black president now.
Martin Luther King: Really?
Michael: Yeah. His name is Barack Obama.
Martin Luther King: It’s a Barck O what now?
Michael: Barack Obama.
Martin Luther King: I don’t know him. Sounds like a Kenyan Muslim.
Michael: No. He’s from Hawaii but he’s black. Well, half black. Like, his mother was white and his father was black.
Martin Luther King: Oh, so his parents are in jail?
Michael: No. No, no, no, no. People are fine with that now. I mean, you had a huge influence in this country.
Martin Luther King: Really?
Michael: Yeah. There’s a big movie that came out this week about you. It’s called Selma. And it looks great, like historical.
Martin Luther King: Well, I’d pay 50 cents to see that. I guess that will be nominated for a lot of Oscars, right?
Michael: Well…
Martin Luther King: Oh, that mountain is getting really high.
Michael: No, come on, man. Come on. What you did in Selma and stuff is still going on today. There were big protest about police violence just this year. Like, thousands of people.
Martin Luther King: Well, that’s good. And who led these protests? Who speaks for diversity today?
Michael: I don’t know. Maybe Michael Moore.
Martin Luther King: Michael Moore? Is he another black Hawaiian?
Michael: Oh, no. No. He’s from Seattle and he’s like the whitest dude on earth. The whitest.
Martin Luther King: Uh-huh. Mountain! And these protests. Did you join them? Like, are you part of the movement?
Michael: Oh, yeah, I definitely protested. It’s really easy now. You just take your phone here, right? Push this twitter button. Alright? Then type in #IAmFurguson or #We’reAllBlack or #Blessed. And then you’re done.
Martin Luther King: That’s how you protest?
Michael: Yeah!
Martin Luther King: Oh my god! That mountain is miles away.
Michael: No. Come on, Dr. King. You made a lot of progress. I’m a white kid, probably, in America and all my heroes are black. I mean they’re mostly rappers and NBA players but they’re still my heroes.
Martin Luther King: Well, that is progress I guess.
Michael: And look at it this way. You’ve got your own holiday and three white presidents share one.
Martin Luther King: Well, I do like that. But I’m afraid I haven’t helped you with your report.
Michael: Ah! Don’t worry. I’m just gonna go on Wikipedia and cut and paste the whole thing.
Martin Luther King: Ah! Very nice. And…
Michael and Martin Luther King: Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night.