Super Bowl Greeting

Cam Newton… Kenan Thompson

Peyton Mannnig… Taran Killam

Policemen… Beck Bennett, Bobby Moynihan

[Starts with Super Bowl greeting intro]

Male voice: And now, a Super Bowl greeting from Cam Newton and Peyton Manning.

[Cut to Cam Newton and Peyton Manning sitting and playing the piano]

Cam Newton: Oh, hey there Peyton.

Peyton Manning: Oh, hey Cam.

Cam Newton: You ready for the big game tomorrow?

Peyton Manning: I mean, not physically, but otherwise sure!

Cam Newton: What a special match-up it’s gonna be, huh?

Cam Newton and Peyton Manning: [singing] Ebony and Ivory
facing off in Super Bowl 50

Cam Newton: The media coverage was interesting this week too.

Peyton Manning: Yeah. I’m just trying to enjoy the whole experience, you know? I’ve been smiling all week, giving people high-fives.

Cam Newton: That sounds great. And when you did that, did they accuse you of show boating and call you a thug?

Peyton Manning: No, not really.

Cam Newton: Hmm, maybe that’s because

Cam Newton and Peyton Manning: [singing] Ebony and Ivory

Cam Newton: In the press there’s a real discrepancy

Peyton Manning: Well, I will say I did get a couple of tough questions from reporters too.

Cam Newton: Tough questions?

Peyton Manning: Yes sir.

Cam Newton: Oh, that’s a shame. I got letters from angry mothers in Tennessee because I dance too much.

Peyton Manning: Well, you do celebrate a lot more than me

Cam Newton: Coz I have Bobby5 touchdowns and you have like, three

Peyton Manning: Actually, it was nine.

Cam Newton: In how many interceptions?

Peyton Manning: I don’t think they keep stats on that anymore. Look, white quarterbacks got tough time too, Cam. I mean look at Johnny Manziel. The Browns just released him.

Cam Newton: Yeah, and all he did was get drunk, missed practice and get accuse of assaulting his girlfriend. But he couldn’t do one thing that could save him… win!

Cam Newton and Peyton Manning: Ebony and Ivory

Cam Newton: Why would anyone be afraid of me?
I do ads for Greek yogurt and Kids Tv

Peyton Manning: And I hang out with Papa John who’s like way creepy

Cam Newton: Yeah, what is the deal with that Papa John guy anyway?

Peyton Manning: Oh! Do not know man! The other day I walked in on the guy, he was kissing one of his pizzas. And I actually heard him whisper to it, “Let’s get you out those toppings.”

Cam Newton: Oh, damn!

Peyton Manning: Yeah, it was way bad man. Let’s just say that I think he might have lost his mind.

Cam Newton: I caught it. Well, if you do retire, we’re gonna miss you Peyton. You’re one of the greatest of all time.

Peyton Manning: Well, thank you very much Cam. And I know that whatever happens, the game is in very good hands with you. We may not have the same style, but I certainly do like your’s a lot.

Cam Newton: Oh, come on, man!

Cam Newton and Peyton Manning: Ebony and Ivory
we’re as different as two quarterbacks could be
but there’s one thing we both agree
we are never gonna see that Concussion movie

Peyton Manning: Hey, I want to show you some of your famous moves of your game, huh?

Cam Newton: Alright! Alright!

[Cam Newton stands]

Look at my dab! Look at my dab!

[Two police officers come in]

Beck: Slow down. Hands where I see em’.

Bobby: Hey, you okay Mr. Manning?

Peyton Manning: Gosh, yea, yeah. He was just having fun.

Bobby: Okay, really? Coz earlier we saw him giving young child a large brown gun.

Cam Newton: Ay, man! That was a football.

[Cut to Super Bowl greeting outro]

Male voice: This has been a Super Bowl greeting form Cam Newton and Peyton Manning.

[The End]