Daniel… John Mulaney
Lisa… Ego Nwodim
DJ… Kenan Thompson
Tanitra… Punkie Johnson
[Daniel and Lisa walk in the door to Robinson family reunion]Daniel: Oh gosh, should we have brought food? I don’t know how these things work.
Lisa: Oh, honey, it’s your first reunion. It’s fine. My family loves you.
Daniel: Really? They love that you’re married to the guy who was LL Bean’s customer of the year?
Lisa: Yes! Yes Just be yourself.
DJ: Alright, alright, alright. Hello everybody. I just want to welcome y’all to the Robinson family reunion. Yes, indeed. We’re gonna have a good time. We’re gonna have a good time. I want everybody to get on out here. Now, it’s time for the cupid shuffle y’all.
[Everyon’es wearing same blue t-shirts while Daniel and Lisa aren’t]Lisa: Wow. Everyone’s wearing T shirts. Did you know about this?
[when Lisa looks at Daniel, he has already worn the t-shirt.]Daniel: Yeah. They didn’t send you one in the mail?
DJ: Common, y’all.
[singing] It don’t matter if you’re young or oldWe’re gonna show you how it goes
to the right, to the right, to the right, to the right
to the left, to the left, to the left, to the left
now, walk it by yourself, yeah, walk it by yourself
Daniel: How many members of your family are here. I feel like they’re all staring at me.
Lisa: Oh my god. They’re not. I promise.
DJ:To the right, to the right, to the right, to the right
to the left, to the left, to the left, to the left
Jordan dunk, Jordan dunk, Jordan dunk, Jordan dunk
Now push it like LeBron, yeah, push it like LeBron
Lisa: Okay, you know, I’m not really sure I know this version of the cupid shuffle.
Daniel: Oh, this here, this is the Atlanta two piece and a biscuit remix.
DJ: Something stink, something stink, something stink, something stink
fold your tuppleware, yeah, fold your tuppleware
Lisa: You know, it’s crazy to think I used to take baths with all these people.
Tanitra: Oh, Daniel, you’re here!
Daniel: Oh, Tanitra. Hey, yeah, this is my wife Lisa.
Tanitra: Oh, hey Lisa. I think we cousins girl, but me and Daniel, we old friends.
Daniel: That’s right. We used to play all day as kids. We just had to be home when the street lights came on. That it. How’s that hotel you’re staying in.
Tanitra: It’s pretty nice, but they didn’t give us no washcloth.
Daniel: What? Who showers without a washcloth?
Tanitra: I know. They super nasty. Alright, Daniel. We still going to Essence Fest this year, right?
Daniel: Oh yeah, I reserved a seat for a live taping of Ayala fix my life.
Tanitra: Alright, then. I’mma holla at ya’ll, alright? I got to make sure they don’t stay close.
Daniel: Yeah, you can’t let that good air out now.
Lisa: Wait. You’re going to Essence Fest?
Daniel: Yeah, I got you a ticket too.
DJ: Call the cops, call the cops, call the cops, call the cops
Yeah, it’s gonna be a while, yeah, it’s gonna be a while,
Playing spades, playing spades, playing spades, playing spades
Yeah, how many books you got, yeah, how many books you got
Lisa: Wait, you brought cards?
Daniel: Yeah. Lisa, common. It’s a family reunion.
Uncle Bonk: Oh, there he is. I heard you was here, Daniel.
Daniel: Oh-oh! Now it’s a party.
Lisa: Wait, you know my uncle Bonk?
Daniel: Well, sure. But I know him as Mr. Robinson. How’s your knee doing sir?
Uncle Bonk: All better. I put a little robitussin on it
Daniel: Works every time. It’s good to see you here. I wasn’t sure if that COVID would keep you away.
Uncle Bonk: Well, I got vaccinated but don’t tell nobody.
Daniel: Yeah, I hear you. I got vaxed too, but it would break my mamma’s heart if she knew I took her government needles.
Uncle Bonk: I hear that. Oh-oh! I gotta go, Daniel. They got me watching my little nephew, always acting up.
Daniel: That child’s promise he’s got no home training.
Uncle Bonk: Yeah. And he needs to stay out of grown folks’ business before he get whipped!
Lisa: See Daniel? I told you everybody loves you.
Daniel: Oh! I only know like Lisa0 or 30 people here, top.
DJ: To the right, to the right, to the right, to the right
to the left, to the left, to the left, to the left
gonna fight, gonna fight, gonna fight, gonna fight
now, rub some vasseline, yeah, rub some vasseline
Alright, great job, everybody. And now, it is time for the Soul Train line.
Daniel: Oh my god. No, no, no. I didn’t know this was happening.
Lisa: Listen honey, you do not have to do it.
Daniel: No. I wouldn’t. I don’t think that’d be appropriate unless–
[Daniel immediately starts dancing]DJ: Now, walk it by yourself, now walk it by yourself