75c: Rob Reiner
Don Pardo: A message from the National Pancreas Association!
[FADE IN on Gilda Radner and John Belushi as a married couple in their living room. John has a long face, and Gilda stares at him with concern.]
Ed: You know, honey, I donít feel good.
Wife: Well, thatís too bad, Ed. Did you ever think that it might be your pancreas?
Ed: Gee, honey. I must have unthinkingly ruled my pancreas out. Iíll check on it first thing in the morning.
[FADE to a doctorís office and SUPERIMPOSE the caption ďTHE NEXT DAY.Ē Dan Aykroyd, as the doctor, looks at a medical chart and shakes his head.]
Doctor: Iím sorry, Ed. Your pancreas is on the fritz. You came to me just in time. Reminds me of a little joke. Knock, knock.
Ed: Whoís there?
Doctor: [matter-of-factly] Edís pancreas.
Ed: Edís pancreas who?
Doctor: I donít know, Ed. But I know this: good glands donít grow on trees.
Ed: Yeah. I guess I havenít done right by...
Ed: My pancreas.
[FADE to Edís wife smiling sweetly and waiting for him to come in. SUPERIMPOSE the caption ďLATER THAT NIGHTĒ as Ed enters the room and sits down on the couch.]
Wife: Geez, Ed, you look like a million bucks! How are you feeling?
Ed: Fit as a fiddle. A fiddle with a healthy pancreas. Ha, ha, ha, ha!
[They kiss once and both grin at the camera.]
[dissolve to art card: "Brought to you by your National Pancreas Association"]
[ dissolve onto audience, zoom in on smiling woman, with SUPER: "Has Been To Lee Radziwell's House"]
Submitted by: Joe Cornfield